The "One Year Of Intentional Living" Project

Did you ever know that you're my hero?

2011-01-19T20:59:00.000-08:00

Mom, as this year comes to an end, I've got another post or two to write to you, to wrap up the gift that I thought I was giving to you...but really...it was you giving it to me.
Thank you. Thank God for you. You truly are the wind beneath my wings.

"Wind Beneath My Wings"

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
It must have been cold there in my shadow,
to never have sunlight on your face.
You were content to let me shine, that's your way.
You always walked a step behind.

So I was the one with all the glory,
while you were the one with all the strength.
A beautiful face without a name for so long.
A beautiful smile to hide the pain.

Did you ever know that you're my hero,
and everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

It might have appeared to go unnoticed,
but I've got it all here in my heart.
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it.
I would be nothing without you.

Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be.
I could fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be.
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings,
'cause you are the wind beneath my wings.

Oh, the wind beneath my wings.
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings.
Fly, fly, fly away. You let me fly so high.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings.

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky,
so high I almost touch the sky.
Thank you, thank you,
thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings.

I love you, Mom.
Crystal

PS: Mom, I think it's time to start a new adventure. At 75, in just a few days for you, and just turning 40 for me, I think we should begin the best year of our lives..."The Best Year Ever"!
(More on this when you get back from your trip.)

What a difference a year makes...

2011-01-15T14:55:00.000-08:00

It's been said that we "over-estimate what we can accomplish in a day, and severely under-estimate what we can achieve or accomplish in one year"!

I think it's true.

What I know for sure, as the past year has come to an end, and another begins, is that 'living intentionally' is the answer, for me, to a more fulfilling and joyous life. And living more intentionally, through your wit and wisdom, Mom, has been life-changing in so many ways.

I am grateful. So very grateful...that you are my mom. That I'm one of your 10 kids, and for all the gifts you've given me this past year.

This blog was to be your birthday present, as you turn 75 in one week. I hope you've enjoyed tuning in 5 days/week or more, over the past year. It's been a true gift to me, to write to you, Mom. I can hardly believe that a year has passed. This was one of the first photos that I posted on your blog, one year ago, when we were home for our birthday's.

So much has happened since then.
So much has changed...
And so much has (thankfully) stayed the same.
Our family remains healthy. Happy. Close and connected. How blessed we all are!

This year, as we celebrated Christmas and your birthday, and Pearl surprised us with a cake for our birthday, with almost all of our family together, there is so much to be thankful for.

Blowing out our candles this year, I could wish for nothing more.

This past year has been an amazing year of being guided or led by intention. Sometimes not even my intention, but God's or the Universe's.

I finally feel 'at home' in my new home. I've never felt truly 'at home' in any of the 8 homes I've lived in, since moving to Kelowna. Sure, many of the houses were lovely. Gorgeous, in fact. And others, well, they were 'fixer-upper's', to say the least, and I'm grateful for every experience of packing and unpacking and packing again to move on to a new adventure. All the renovating, fixing and work on the houses were a metaphor for working on myself. Sort of a never-ending project called 'life'.

If we're still alive, the project isn't complete.

But this house, Mom, I said a few years ago, without even thinking about it, "Anne, when you're ready to sell your home, let me know. I'd love to buy it." When Gwen called to say that it was for sale, I didn't remember that I had said that I'd buy it, at first. But it was meant to be. And every time I look outside and see Gwen living across the street or drive up into the drive way, I feel, "I'm home!"

The extra space for visitors (hint-hint), fruit trees and sunrise every day are miracles that never cease! I still can't believe I get to wake up every day to the bright sunrise and view! I dreamed of this 16 years ago when I moved to Kelowna! In fact, I remember driving around Caseloma when we first moved here and I thought, wouldn't it be incredible to live over here!

And the new house is just one thing that's changed this year!

Simplifying and focusing on what I truly want in my life has been a work in progress. I have made huge strides...and still have a long way to go. The way you live your life, with simplicity and focus on your own true calling of your faith and family, have been a huge influence on me, Mom.

This past year has also provided a tremendous gift of intentionally 'slowing down'. Slowing down in every way from my driving to how I live my life. I could still slow down a little more, but it's been wonderful to not try to keep up to anyone and just go at my own pace. To not worry about the rat race and actually take myself out of that race and enter a different race called 'enjoying the present moment'.

Slowing down enough to start enjoying the present moment has been the greatest gift this year. Being open to possibility and not attached to the outcome in so many moments of the past year has filled me with joy.

I guess that's what joy is.

Living in the present moment + being open to possibility + no attachment to the outcome = JOY!

This is you, Mom. It's how you have parented all of us and how you love your grand-kids too. You're always fully present with us, you're open to whatever happens nad you don't seem to worry or get attached to the future and any outcome. You never cared about what we did for our careers, you just cared if we were happy and that we grew up to be kind and good.

And who knew that when you slow down long enough, you not only find yourself, you find love too?

Yes. Who knew?

Perhaps the past several years (all the things that went right and all the things that went wrong) have been a test.... A test...To discover what I'm made of. To find my faith. To teach me so many life-lessons that are actually life-blessings. To raise the bar on my own life so that I attract what's best for my heart and spirit and not just what my ego thinks it wants.

As this year comes to an end, I am so grateful, Mom.
So grateful for you and our family. So grateful for al that is and isn't.
So grateful to have had this little connection with you that has meant so much to me.

I love you Mom.
See you tomorrow.
I just can't quite sign off yet.
love Crystal

Cleaning cupboards

2011-01-13T09:09:00.000-08:00

You know when you finally get down and pull out all the stuff from the kitchen cupboards, everything, and then reorganize it, putting back only the things that are supposed to be there, discarding the containers with no lids and other lids that have no containers and then all the right stuff goes in the right place and for some reason, it just feels so much better.

It's that way with everything. Not just the kitchen cupboards, but the office, laundry room, clothes closet and junk drawer.

And with projects, work, various jobs and all of those 'cupboards' that could be reorganized, pulled apart and put back together again more effficiently and organized.

That's what I'm doing today with a few projects; finishing year-end! It's just like matching lids and containers - receipts and visa statements....and the feeling when I'm done will be the same!

Lighter! Less stressed! More at ease and rejuvinated.
And besides, it's still snowing...so it's a good day to stay inside!
love you, Mom.
Crystal

What would my mom do?

2011-01-12T08:01:00.000-08:00

On days like today...when over a foot of snow has fallen lastnight and another foot is expected today...I think the best thing to do is 'stay inside'!

Only go out if you have to.

And with a snowfall weather warning in effect for Kelowna today, I think that's just what I will do! Stay inside!

Turn on the fireplace. Work from home today. Bake something.
And maybe go make a few snow angels on Gwen's yard later.

Love you Mom,
Crystal

Happy Birthday Video

2011-01-09T10:58:00.000-08:00

Hi Mom,
I've been trying for 2 days to upload your Birthday video to your blog, but it isn't working.
So, I'm going to send the 2 videos to you on a memory stick and you can just put it into your computer.
It's incredible that 10 days have passed into the new year! Having the flu since Dec. 31st was not really how expected to kick off the new year. But it probably was the very best thing for me.
I slept for 3 days straight and then when, I taught last week, I came home almost every night and put my flannel PJ's on as soon as I got home.
This past weekend, I am feeling pretty good.

What I learned from you, in getting the flu, Mom, is to 'embrace' and accept it; make the best of it; do what I can to make the situation better; don't complain; and allow time to take it's course.

That's a good plan, for when we're sick...and every day.
- embrace and accept the situation
- make the best of it
- do what we can to make it better
- don't complain
- allow time to take it's course

Here are some photos I found online that I never used this past year, in writing your blog.
It's amazing how fast the year has gone.
It's amazing how much I have cherished writing you and thinking about all that you've taught me.

...Maybe we could have just a few more days.
Love Crystal

Christmas 2010...will go down in history!

2011-01-03T07:20:00.000-08:00

Don't wait too long...

2010-12-19T09:03:00.000-08:00

Lastnight, Linda, Steph and I got together for a glass of wine and visit...and celebration of our birthdays! They're both born on Dec 27th!

It's been too long since we got together last. We've been friends for almost a decade and it's so wonderful to just be able to pick up where we left off.

Whether it's a run together, where we pack in as much conversation in an hour and then hug and say good bye until the next time...or conversation over wine...I realize, sitting with two of the best friends anyone could have, that I should not wait too long for the next time.

It's funny. If one of us called and said, "I need your help.", we would all be there in an instant. Even faster than that. We'd do most anything for one another. But, when it's just 'life', and nothing urgent is really going on, and life just gets busy, it's easy for too much time to pass between those runs or visits.

I wrote an email to Linda and Steph this morning and wanted to write a little note to send with the photo we took lastnight and my fingertips just seemed to write this by themselves.

Happy birthday to US!
May this next year be our best ever!!
May we always have good friends to drink wine and visit with.
May we always have great health, fit bodies and lots of energy.
May we spend our lives honouring our calling and following our hearts.
May we go confidently into the world sharing our gifts and passion.
May we be rewarded with satisfaction and funds for our time and talents.
May we always shine brightly, live in possibility and believe that all of our dreams will come true!

I think I was thinking about the birthday card that Linda gave me. It was amazing.
It said, "Do you remember the way it felt to make a wish and never - not even for a second - doubt that it might come true?"

I do remember.
Maybe it's time for that again...to live in that place of dreaming - and believing - in those wishes and that they will come true.

I just listened to the radio this morning and Michael Buble was being interviewed. They asked him, "Could you ever have imagined the success you are currently experiencing; selling 25 million records, playing in front of thousands in stadiums?" And Michael Buble's response was incredible. He said, "You know, I think I was the only one who believed I could sell that many records or play to sold-out crowds in stadiums." He went on to say that he "...started out, singing Christmas carols in shopping malls, with his grandfather waiting and watching for hours..." but he always believed in his dreams of singing in front of thousands.

Mom, thank you for always believing in me...and for never waiting too long to tell me how much you love me.

I love you,
Crystal

"Keep dreaming, wishing and planning. There is immeasureable power in it."

...one of my very best friends

2010-12-17T12:34:00.000-08:00

...who's been there and done that with me for the past 12 years!
I just love this little bear!

50 Year Friends...

2010-12-16T09:01:00.000-08:00

Wouldn't it be nice to have a friend for 50 years?

I think so.

A "50 Year Friend" would have 'been there and done that' with you for all of life's major (and minor) events. How lucky we would all be if we could get to that place of having a 50 year friend...or group of friends.

This is part of my tribe here in Kelowna. We had lunch yesterday. It was wonderful.

And the 2 ladies with matching hairdoo's sitting behind us were a great reminder to me of how much it means to have those life-long friendships.

Tomorrow night, I'm getting together with another group of amazing friends. How lucky we are to be able to connect, get busy with life, and then reconnect again and pick up where we left off, as if it were yesterday.

And before we know it, we'll all be home with you Mom, and while there, having lunch with our group of 7, who have now, for some us, been friends since we were 8 years old. That's a 31 year friendship so far. And I feel so grateful that it's OK to just connect and reconnect and get busy with life and then reconnect when time permits or the opportunity arises...and we just pick up where we left off.

Mom, I can't wait to see you!! Just a few more days!!!
Thank you for being such a wonderful friend to me.
love you,
PS Your hair looks way cooler than these ladies! :)

Now THAT is amusing!

2010-12-15T09:22:00.000-08:00

Life's much better when I look at things in a funny way.

There's amusing things everywhere!

Things to laugh AT...and laugh ABOUT.

Things to smile about and relish in....everywhere I look.

Even loading all the leaves from the hostel and the rental is completely amusing...when I look at it that way. Amusing...and dirty! (Did I mention that I had to dump out the bags of leaves?)

Yesterday, I was on a mission! I loaded up all the leaves and took them to the landfill. Then I loaded up all the cardboard recycling from the move to the new house (that had been sitting in my garage...and then moved to the side of the house) and took that to the recycling place, too.

And everywhere I turned, I encountered something amusing...or something to smile about.

The past few days, with a bit of a 'kick in the butt' from watching that movie, Morning Glory, I've been thinking about the coming year and really dreaming and planning what I want the next year to look like.

It's amazingly simple....look at everything with amusement in my eyes...and then put good stuff in...and VOILA!!...good stuff comes out!

Whether it's a good movie, some good music, a good book or a great conversation with a friend....

When I put good stuff into my brain, body and life...great stuff comes out!

Yes...it's obvious and simple...but quite extraordinary when actually lived and experienced.

Love you, Mom. Thanks for always keeping things simple. Never complicating life. Always leading life with amusement and the simple equation of 'put good stuff in...and good stuff will come out'!

See you soon!
love Crystal

Morning Glory!

2010-12-12T10:32:00.001-08:00

What's the story, Morning Glory?

"Seize the morning!"

Lastnight, we went to see this movie. It was just what my spirit needed.
A little inspiration.
A little reminder of who I am and who I could be.
A big kick in the butt to get a little more passionate and focused on my calling and reason for being here...and not get bogged down and caught up by day-to-day circumstance and unimportant issues!

Here's what the movie is about:
When hard-working TV producer Becky Fuller is fired from a local news program, her career begins to look as bleak as her hapless love life. Stumbling into a job at "Daybreak" (the last-place national morning news show), Becky decides to revitalize the show by bringing on legendary TV anchor Mike Pomeroy (Harrison Ford). Unfortunately, Pomeroy refuses to cover morning show staples like celebrity gossip, weather, fashion and crafts - let alone work with his new co-host, Colleen Peck, (Diane Keaton) a former beauty queen and longtime morning show personality who is more than happy covering morning "news." As Mike and Colleen clash, first behind the scenes and then on the air, Becky's blossoming love affair with fellow producer, Adam Bennett begins to unravel - and soon Becky is struggling to save her relationship, her reputation, her job and ultimately, the show itself.

Becky, the TV producer follows her passion, conviction and calling, working all hours of the day and night...compelled to make the morning show a success and make her dreams come true.

She's inspired...and inspiring.

And with her passion, values, conviction and strength, she holds everyone, including herself, to higher 'ideals' and to the potential of what they could become...and, of course, in true Hollywood style, they rise and become what they could be.

I laughed out loud. Cried at times, sat on the edge of my seatand found myself identifying with the characters and in some way, the movie spoke to me and reached out and grabbed me, as if to shake me and remind me of my own potential...when I am committed, filled with conviction and passionate about my calling!

Very inspiring.
(Yes...I'm a sucker for those typical Hollywood movies...but I don't care!)

I loved her exhuberant energy and wish I allowed more of that energy in me to come out. I know it's in me. I so identified with this part of her character... but sometimes I seem to get in a little rut, unfocused and sort of uninspired.

There were so many great scenes in the movie but one of the best ones was near the end when Harrison Ford gives Becky some great advice and tells her that he worked so much, in excess, always away from home, and when he was at home with his family, he was watching the news from the corner of his eye, his phone and computer always close at hand....and because of that he ended up with nothing...until he met her. She helped him 'find himself' in many ways and find his calling once again.

His advice to her was valid though.

Put the phone away. Turn off the computer. Realize and remember that work, no matter how important it might seem, is nothing compared to the importance of family and loved ones. If you don't turn off the phone, tv, computer...you'll end up alone, with nothing.

Good food for thought.

Another great message for me, from the movie, is the hope and possibility of love and having a partner that encourages you to honour your calling.

I love happy endings.
I love the sense of possibility.
And I love the kick in the butt to honour my calling and seize the morning!
Mom, you often said the words, "Morning Glory" in a variety of contexts...and you would love this movie.

Love you,
Crystal

It just depends on how you look at it.

2010-12-11T06:47:00.000-08:00

It's Saturday!!
I'm grateful.
I had a big week of teaching this week - what a great group of students! The time goes by so fast. I love what I do in the classroom and I know they walk out as 'different, more hope-filled and inspired people' after our 5 days together. I know I'm called to be here. But something is missing. There's more. I think it's evolution. I think I'm evolving. What was once my perfect calling isn't quite a perfect fit anymore and I know there's something bigger out there for me...

I have almost everything I could need or want. I have a blessed life. In every way. It's not 'things' that I'm missing in my life. It has something to do with my calling. Like 'unfinished business'. Things yet to accomplish and experience and share. (Thank God...because I hope to have another 40 years in this life and I should really have something to do in that time.) :)

I know it starts with finishing projects that I've started. And that's where I'm going to focus until they are done. Everything from my booklet, book, all my work 'creations' need attention and I should see where I could develop them (well, OK, how about 'finish' them first?)...who knows...my inspiration might be right there!

I think it is actually. I don't need to go out searching for my perfect calling. It's right here. Right in front of me. Inside me.

It just depends on how I look at it.

Looking at the same thing, with different filters in our mind, create a very different picture.
Mom, your happiness in life probably depended a lot on 'how you looked at it' and I'm so grateful to continue to look to you for a little inspiration when I need it.
I can't wait to see you.
I miss my momma!
love you,
Crystal

The Next Generation of You

2010-12-08T18:01:00.000-08:00

A speaker that I met once at a conference wrote an article this week about "the next generation of you"and in it he said...

When you buy into the power of thought, and realize those thoughts actually attract and create your environment, and that environment helps create you – that’s when things get really interesting!

And then, he went on to ask the questions, "What are you doing to create the environment around you? And thus, the next generation of you?"

Good questions.

Great questions actually!

Mom, you probably never asked yourself these questions...but look at the next generation and the one after that...that you've created! You have lived the 'power of thought' more than I could ever hope to master. Sometimes I feel like I've got such a long way to go to get where I want to be. But, I'm sure glad to be your #8 and in that next generation of you!

Love you,
Can't wait to see you!
10 days and counting!
love Crystal

Snowflakes...

2010-12-07T20:16:00.000-08:00

How is it that each and every snowflake is unique? Different? Stunning? Beautiful in it's own way? It's true that no two snowflakes are the same...which is simply astounding to me!

I absolutely love the snow, especially when it's falling! I don't really love 'winter' but I do love the snow!

This morning as I look out the window and see that there's a bit of snow that fell lastnight, it's gorgeous and white everywhere! It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!! But that's another story!!!

I think there's a few things we can learn from these little (and abundant snowflakes)...
No two snowflakes are the same...and neither are we. Not just that each of us are different and unique...but that we each evolve and grow and are different from who we were in the past. And Mom, you've always simply accepted everyone for who they are (in that moment) without assuming that they were the same as they were last year or even yesterday. Acceptance is something you seem to be so good at.

Some snowflakes are light and fluffy...where others are heavy and difficult to shovel...because of the temperature of the environment. The environment...is everything for me...not really the temperature (although I'm a little cold with the temperature change from holidays to home) but it's more about the people we surround ourselves with, the love in the air, the positivity and energy that we give and receive from people around us...that's what I'm talking about. Mom...you created such a great environment for us to grow and become who we are. How did you get to be so smart?

Falling snow...lots of it...make me feel so cozy and warm inside. That's what I remember about winter at home. You created the most wonderful, loving, warm home for all of us...to grow up in and come home to! The colder it was outside, the warmer it was inside. Especially after shovelling the walk. I loved shovelling the drive way. (Please tell Don that I want to shovel when we come home for xmas!!) I can't wait to come home!! The more snow the better!!!

Love you, Mom.
Snowflakes and winter always make me think of you and home Mom. And snow angels are the first thing that come to mind whenever there's more than an inch or two of snow on the ground!
See you soon!!
love Crystal

Ten Rules for Being human!

2010-12-07T06:11:00.000-08:00

I love this poem. I don't remember when I first found it...but I've read it often over the years and, every time, it speaks to me so magically, that it feels as if I'm reading it for the very first time.

I had a great sleep lastnight, going to bed at 8:30pm and waking this morning at 5:30am, feeling energized and eager for the day to begin! Love that feeling.

This morning I am loving the feeling of being inspired. There's lots of other feelings to embrace too with equal eagerness b/c they can teach me so much: Being humbled. Making mistakes and trying again. Doing well and celebrating that success too. Being hope-filled and eager. Disappointed and hurt.

This morning, I am feeling so inspired, knowing that all of these feelings offer a great opportunity for me to grow...and reach my potential.

These are some amazing rules (and reminders) for being human.

Mom, you could have come up with these. I can't remember if I've mentioned these before but, they're on my mind this morning at 5:30am as I wake up for the day...so here they are.

Love you,
Can't wait to see you!
love Crystal

Ten Rules for Being Human

by Cherie Carter-Scott

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it's yours to keep for the entire period.
2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, "life."
3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The "failed" experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately "work."
4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.
5. Learning lessons does not end. There's no part of life that doesn't contain its lessons. If you're alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.
6. "There" is no better a place than "here." When your "there" has become a "here", you will simply obtain another "there" that will again look better than "here."
7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.
8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.
9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life's questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.
10. You will forget all this.

Home...safe, sound and tired!

2010-12-06T06:24:00.001-08:00

Hi Mom,

Just a note to say that I'm back! We got in at midnight lastnight - which was really like 2:30am on Costa Rica time.

Thank God for that guy who drives the cart that hollers out "CART" as he's trying to make his way through the crowds! There were no crowds when we got to Houston b/c after over an HOUR in custom's due to long line up's, we got on the train and raced to our gate...and as we got to the "c" terminal and were running down the hall, with not a soul in sight, the cart passed us and then turned around to pick us up...We had over 2 hours to make the connection in Houston...but it was barely enough! With custom's and picking up our bags, and getting across the airport on the train...we used up about 1 hour and 59 minutes! They were calling 'last call' and we were the very last two people to get on the flight.

Whew!

(Not our fault...there was no dilly-dallying! Well, except for the customs workers....they were so slow it was crazy!)

I got home, looked around and it appears that Gwen has been doing her magic! She and Karla have been painting the upstairs! Oh My GOD!!! It's gorgeous! Photos to come later this week!

Thankg God for sisters!
...and kart drivers!
And you, Mom!
I'll call you today when I'm en route to work in Penticton!
love Crystal
PS: Living intentionally today...lessons from my mother..."Remain calm in the 1 hour line up in Custom's and find something posiitve to think about." :)

Going home today...

2010-12-04T08:13:00.000-08:00

Hi Mom,
We're on our way home today.
Sorry I've been awol. the internet didn't work again yesterday. I'm writing you from the airport in Liberia, C.Rica, and we'll be on our way to Houston at 1pm...then to Seattle and home. I'll call you tomorrow...and try you from Houston today....

These are a few photos of daily life the past two weeks...crib games and home-made nachos on the beach. I won 3 games...out of 15! Not a great track record...but you (and Ozzie) used to help count, make sure we weren't forgetting any points, etc....well...it's not always the case! I missed points for the jack, and a million others... haha...very funny...it didn't matter...the nachos were more of a priority! :)

We walked the 10 minute walk to town on the beach daily...and often 2 or 3 times/day. It was gorgeous. Simply gorgeous. In the morning or during the day, it was lovely and at night the moon and/or stars were out. It was a great location!

Can't wait to get my feet back on Canadian ground and see you soon for Christmas!!
love you,
Crystal

You're never too old to learn something new...

2010-12-02T10:44:00.000-08:00

Hi Mom,
Well, the camera didn't capture our finest moments...but here are a few shots of surfing yesterday! We've drastically improved over the past week...but, well, um, we're still on the 9ft surfboards...which clearly illustrates, as we carry them from the surf rental shop to the beach, "You're a beginner, dude!" compared to the 5ft boards that the real surfers are carrying under their arm!
Love you,
Can't wait to see you,
Crystal

Savouring every moment

2010-12-01T18:29:00.000-08:00

...Just a few more days and we're leaving this little paradise.
The past week went by so fast! The internet went down so I'm sorry I couldn't write, Mom. I did get out to post a few photos for you but I'm sorry I didn't write anything!

We've had such a great week doing everything from renting bikes (with one gear only and the kind that you just press backwards and you stop...Oh My GOD...was that hard!)

We went to a little local village nearby and dropped off a bunch of pens, crayons, pencils, paints, etc. to a public school that doesn't have a lot of money.

We have gone surfing every day...and I can honestly say that we're improving a lot on the boards.

We've watched some great sunsets, walked on the beach, read lots and lounged in the lawn chairs way out on the beach when the tide was out.

As the days go by, it makes me appreciate every moment a little more. When there was 8 days left, it was easy not to think about how many days we had left here...but now, as we're down to just a few days, time seems more valuable and I want to savour every moment.

I should have been savouring every moment even more than I have. It was easy to take this little routine of getting up, surfing, walking on the beach, eating, relaxing and reading for granted...

And now, as we start to pack up and get ready to go...it all just feels like it went by too fast!!

We're taking the camera to the beach tomorrow...to take photos of surfing. Will post them!! haha! Could be very funny!

Have a wonderful day Mom. Love you. Can't wait to see you!
Thank you for this little reminder to savour every moment a little more and not take time for granted!

Love Crystal

2010-11-29T15:40:00.000-08:00

The Biology of Belief!

2010-11-29T05:42:00.000-08:00

Well...at least we know how to count! I think we just ran out of time...if we had 3 more minutes of play, I think we could have got another touchdown!

It was a sad ending to a great game! I honestly though we were going to win.

We watched the game in the 20 seat theatre downtown along with about 30 or 40 other Rider fans...and one Montreal fan. It was a great time. The little theatre was no bigger than the size of a small shop (store) in a little strip mall and they built elevated tier seating with a big screen on the wall....serving popcorn, chilli, beer and snacks. It was awesome. All by donation. The guy probably made more money lastnight than the past 2 weeks combined.

I really did think we were going to win. The collective energy of Rider fans everywhere is undeniable.

But, I guess it wasn't to be. Not this year anyway. And at least we can't be criticized for not knowing how to count this year. Yes...I think we just ran out of time.

Isn't that the case with life...time runs out too quickly. It's the same when on a holiday. The days just go by too fast.

I'm sure I've written about this book before, Mom, but I grabbed it to bring on the holiday...I was reading this book, called The Biology of Belief yesterday when we were sitting on the beach (by our sign in the sand)...and it talked about how we're actually all connected by a form of energy (example: Rider Nation!) and that it's not our genes that actually make us who we are...but it's also the 'environment' we are in that creates our identity.

And what a wonderful environment we're all in. How fortunate and blessed we are. It goes against the model of science that's been taught the past 150 years, the book says, where it's the 'survival of the fittest' and everyone is on their own, not connnected to anyone or anything else....but they're finding now that all things are connected. That when something happens in the environment, it affects everything down the line...like dominoes or a chain reaction. Very interesting....and important in the big picture.

The book talked about genetically modified foods...and how the modified genes (say...in corn) get consumed and eaten by humans...and then the modified genes in corn affect the bacteria in our digestive systems and change them...

Fascinating.

And reading that we're all so very connected is fitting to read as the Grey Cup was on, unifying Saskatcehwan people everywhere.

We are all so connected...and so lucky to be a part of our wonderful family.

And now, I gotta go... it's high tide this morning...when the waves are bigger...so more to come later!
love you, Mom.
Crystal

Pride!

2010-11-28T06:34:00.000-08:00

No matter where you are in the world...if you're from Saskatchewan...today is a very exciting day!

We found a place to watch the game in Tamarindo! At the movie theatre in town! It has 20 seats in it! I'm sure there's more than 20 Rider fans here...so they're putting a TV outside the theatre as well! They guy said we could come early and decorate it up in green!

I don't think we'll do that but I've got my greeh Hawaiian Leigh ready to wear that I brought from home!

Mom, thank you for teaching us to have pride in who we are, to stand up for something and to be proud of where we come from!
Love you,
Crystal
PS: Go Rider's!

Pack lighter...

2010-11-27T07:45:00.000-08:00

It's been a few days and I can already see that I brought too many clothes. I should have packed lighter. All we really needed to bring was a bathing suit, some exercise clothes, a pair of flip-flops, a sundress or two, a pair of jeans and few t-shirts and a sarong that could be used for a towel, a wrap-around, a shawl, a beach blanket and a million other things...

Oh, one more thing to bring: a head-lamp which is the perfect flashlight. We've walked back to the hotel on the beach every night and the headlamp is a needed item...to keep an eye out for racoons, cats and dogs racing along the beach at night!

The weather continues to be a perfect mix of sunshine and rain...with the rain falling just at the perfect time.

Surfing is another story. The smaller the board...the harder it is to stand up. Yesterday was a perfect blend of catching waves, momentarily riding the surf and then either a belly-flop (for me) or graceful jump into the water (for Eric).

Gracefulness is clearly not my strongpoint when surfing. At least, I found some other bathing suit bottoms...so I'm not concerned anymore that I'm flashing the world a bare butt cheek!

:)
Mom, you would love the waves and sound of the ocean and walking along the beach when the tide is out.
love you,
Crystal

Take advantage of every moment...

2010-11-26T07:51:00.000-08:00

The torrential downpour in the morning was a great sight...from indoors!
It rained so hard that you couldn't see beyond the trees to the water!

It created some space to get out our guitars and practise...which was lots of fun but futile, for the most part.

The rain cleared up just in time for high-tide and Day 2 of surfing was pretty awesome with big waves, smaller boards that we rented and a few moments of pure satisfaction.
Yup...a few 'moments' and that's about it (at least for me). Eric caught almost every wave and was up! Today is another day though...and I'm ready.
Lastnight we wandered down the beach to this place that had live music. It was awesome! Right on the beach. Christmas lights up everywhere. Good music. And this fire-twirler provided a great show!
On our way home, a racoon was running behind us and scared us as it passed by, seemingly on a mission like no tomorrow for someone's garbage bin!
Today we're scoping out our Sunday game for the Rider's hopeful win in the Grey Cup!!
Love you, Mom.
Thanks for teaching us to take advantage of every moment.
love Crystal

Surfing 101

2010-11-25T06:36:00.000-08:00

What surfing IS and ISN'T!
- Surfing is clearly not as easy as it looks.
- Take the larger board when they offer it. That extra foot might be appreciated...and needed.
- Being a good paddle-boarder does not make one a good surfer.
- Every wave can be a good wave...don't let it go by...just paddle and TRY.
- Waiting for the 'perfect wave' won't make me a better surfer
- Focus!
- When you lose track of time...and hours go by...you know you're having a fabulous time...even if you've barely gotten up on the board!
- You're never too old to learn to surf. I might think I'm old compared to the 10 year old kids out there on the water...but when the white haired guy that has 20 years on me is sitting on the board next to me...you know that surfing has no age limit.
- Looking 'cool' isn't likely to happen when you're learning to surf.

- Part of the fun of surfing is sitting on your board, watching other people catch a wave and have a great ride!
- Knowing what to do and actually doing it are two very different things.
- That little dread-lock dude that makes it look so easy was born on that surf board!

- Clearly...none of these photos are of me! I could barely stand up on the board yesterday!
- Today is going to be a fabulous surfing day...and if I can tighten up the string on my bathing suit shorts, that would be a good thing too!

Hope the snow is subsiding mom and the temperature warming up!
love you,
Crystal
PS Surfing is like how my momma bakes...follow the recipe and it'll turn out perfectly. Deviate from the plan or forget to measure...and it's a face-plant in the ocean!

Sunshine and healthy drinks!

2010-11-24T17:07:00.000-08:00

Surfing and Sunshine!

2010-11-24T06:48:00.000-08:00

Day 2...

SURFING and SUNSHINE is the intention of the day!

More photos to come and I promise I will take time today to write a bit.
Yesterday was spent checking out surf shops and schools, getting groceries, figuring out the internet connection, dodging the rain, going for a run on the beach and watching the sunset and a little girl learn to surf! (Check out the sunset photo...a bit cloudy...but you'll see a little girl standing on a surf board...it was so cute!)

Love you, Mom.
Thanks for being there when I called on Skype.
Talk to you soon and tune in later for photos of surfing!!
love Crystal

Safe and sound...

2010-11-23T10:05:00.000-08:00

Hi Mom,
Safe and sound and Oh My GOD...only steps from the ocean!
More to come.
Love you,
Crystal

Intentions that last for generations?

2010-11-19T22:06:00.001-08:00

Hi Mom,

While I was driving and working today, I was listening to an audio program that I haven't listened to in a while, by this scientist named Lynn Mctaggart. She wrote a book called, "The Intention Experiment". I'm sure I've mentioned it before, but if I haven't....It's about how our intentions or prayers have an impact in our lives and the world around us.

When I was listening to this one part today, it came to me that YOU do exactly what they were talking about in the program. Basically, the science experiment studied fruit flies that had been hatched in 2 different containers. One container was prayed over (Some people sent the container "good intentions" basically. I know it sounds hokey...but wait!) The other dish - well, nobody did anything with it. Then...the 2 dishes were sent to a different lab where the new lab people didn't know what had happened with the 2 containers. They, then, hatched fruit flies in the 2 separate containers...and what they found was very interesting! The fruit flies that were hatched in the container that had been prayed over actually were larger, healthier and lived longer! So did their offspring....compared to the other container. The findings were too significant to be ignored. The end result was that, in some way, the prayers or intentions of the people had an impact on the fruit flies for generations.

I think it's the same way in our family! It's because of YOUR intention for all of us; your kids and grandkids, that we somehow seem so blessed; so lucky in so many ways. And the impact of your prayers and intentions, Mom, if it's the same as the science experiment, lasts for generations to come. In the experiment, it said that it was as if the DNA of the fruit flies was encoded to be healthier and live longer.

I thought it was fascinating.

So...today I sent out positive thoughts to everyone I encountered. (Just in my head, of course.) And while I am not sure anyone else noticed (consciously or subconsciously), it certainly made my day a good one.

I was in a great mood! (Gotta make up for my grouchy mood a couple weeks ago...I'm still in the hole - got a ways to go.) Lots of great stuff happened, too. Wonderful little coincidences...that probably weren't really coincidences at all.
- Woke up just in a great mood, feeling grateful for lots of things and so excited to go on a holiday!
- also excited to see all the snow! It's a winter wonderland out there!
- Chatted on the phone with a girlfriend that I haven't spoken with in a while and can't wait to see some of my girlfriends at this event tomorrow night for the Junior Chamber (Jaycees).
- Ran into another girlfriend at Superstore and had an awesome conversation for 20 minutes in the middle of the aisle.
- Got so many things on my list completed and crossed off...and had such a good time for no real reason.
- Went to see Gwen at the mall and check out their kiosk. It's awesome!!

Really, there was nothing super-amazing about the day...but sending out little intentions for people to experience increased joy, happiness, abundance, love, etc. was a lot of fun. It just felt good.

I did want to send you something too, Mom.
It's the first snowfall here in Kelowna and whenever it snows, I think of you. So...
These are for you.

I went to Eric's parents house and made snow angels (anonymously) in their yard. I thought it was funny. But for all I know, the joke's on me b/c they were probably watching from the windows.

Either way, Mom, I'm sending snow angels to your back yard and hope you know how much all of us appreciate your prayers and positive intentions that you send us every day. The impact you have is incredible.

Love Crystal

Perhaps...

2010-11-19T08:32:00.000-08:00

"Perhaps the real heart within us is not just a pump. Perhaps the real heart within us is about love and faith. Perhaps the physical body is not who we really are. Perhaps we are these invisible souls walking around, and the body is just an instrument or metaphor for something we are trying to learn."

Yesterday I watched part of the Oprah show. It was about faith and healing. And it was fascinating to say the least.

There was no debate or argument about science versus religion or anything like that. The show was just about this faith healer in Brazil and people on the show recounted their experiences there.

One person was the editor for O Magazine. Another was a medical doctor. And another was a lady with cancer. They all had their own stories to share and all came away with a profound healing experience of one sort or another.

The rest of the day, as i was working, I couldn't help but think about the show and the capacity for humans to create their own world with the power of belief and the strength of their faith.

What if....the guy is a hoax, which most science believers think.
What if....he's actually got a gift from God, which most believers think.

Whatever the truth is...people are walking away healed - and whether it's actually their own faith and belief (that they will experience a miracle) that plays a part in what goes on...or whether they're just present and receive a miracle...it doesn't really matter...because something is working.

Dr. Rediger, one of the people on the show (the skeptic doctor) had this to say after going to see the healer:

"Perhaps the real heart within us is not just a pump, he says. "Perhaps the real heart within us is about love and faith. Perhaps the physical body is not who we really are. Perhaps we are these invisible souls walking around, and the body is just an instrument or metaphor for something we are trying to learn."

Mom, thank you for teaching us to live in a belief of "Perhaps".

Perhaps things aren't always what they seem. Perhaps things are not always black and white. Perhaps there's more to the story than what we know. Perhaps we must believe it and then we'll see it. And perhaps faith and love might be more real than science ever could prove.

Love you,
Crystal

PS And perhaps it's time to dust off that shovel and get out the car scraper! Winter has arrived in Kelowna!! You know what that means....Christmas is coming!!

Use what God has given you!

2010-11-18T09:32:00.000-08:00

Mom,

Using what God has given me, I realize that we are capable of so much.

This is our promotional video that I made for the next DIVA Retreat...I had to put it into two parts b/c it was too big to upload in one file.
Let me know what you think.

I love you, Mom.
Crystal

Be the Asker Of The Questions

2010-11-16T22:24:00.000-08:00

To be on a quest is nothing more or less
than to be an asker of questions.

Today, I was on a quest.

I was on a quest to get to the bottom of a very strange phone message that I received on my home phone.

The phone message was from a collections agency. The person on the phone was clearly suffering from one or all of the following:
- he did not like his job and was absolutely obnoxious as a result
- he thought that leaving a rude, disrespectful and almost threatening message would somehow get him what he wanted
- he was power-tripping because he was treated unfairly as a child and was acting out his frustration now, decades later.

I have no idea!

I had no idea why they were calling me. And I am not outstanding on any bills that I know of. But I was still a bit uneasy, wondering, "Why on earth is someone calling me and being such an idiot." The other thought that came to my mind was, "Oh My God! Did I forget to pay a bill?!"

I called the guy back and he didn't have any record of me.

Very odd! Very odd indeed, because he left a message using my name and he had my home phone number!

I rarely use that number so I was even surprised by this call for that reason alone, not to mention the threatening tone and/or financial issue inferred!

Upon further research, the guy had absolutely no record of me, my name, anything! Except my phone number.

He hung up and called me back about 15 minutes later...asking, "What is your last name?"

I told him and he was then confused. He still had no idea who I was! I told him that I could replay his message and he would hear that he mentioned my name and some personal details - a CIBC credit, etc.

Well, at the end of the 20 minute discussion, we figured it out! A girl who used to have my phone number was also named Crystal, except with a different last name.

So...the phone message appeared to be for me...after all, it is my phone number and my name is Crystal...but it wasn't really for me.

It was just a coincidence.

We finally figured it out...but it took 20 minutes. It could have taken much less time if I had been 'the asker of the questions', if I had been a little more intentional. They guy on the phone thought he had the right person so he was not asking any more questions...he just wanted money. I should have asked clearer questions in the beginning and that would have solved things in 1 minute.

Mom, you ask great questions. You really are on a quest...for each of us; your kids and grandkids...and you are an amazing 'asker of the questions' to help us become what we could be! Thank you.

I love you, Mom.
Thank you for the quest you're on...and for your sharp wit, sarcasm and just the right amount of humour that I borrowed today when I was talking to this guy today!

love Crystal

The Saskatchewan Roughriders and my Mom

2010-11-15T07:14:00.000-08:00

What do the Saskatchewan Roughriders and my Mom have in common?

1. They both know how to move forward without letting things snag them, hold them up or hold them back from where they want to go.

2. They both know how to work with their team (Mom: family, loved ones, friends) (Rider's: their team-mates and fans) to get things done.

3. They both look obstacles right in the face and face things head-on with courage, grace and inner conviction.

4. They both know how to take hold of an opportunity and seize it when it's there, infront of them.

5. They are both creative in their efforts...sometimes you go around, sometimes you go through and sometimes you go over whatever is in your way.

6. They both know that sometimes life can get messy and you just have to get down and dirty and fight for what you want.

7. And above all else...they both know that in good times and in bad, when it's easy and when it's difficult...you just have to pray!

What a game!!
I love you, Mom!
Crystal

PS: The Rider's and my Mom also know that there's value in everything...and what someone else (or another team) discard something (or someone)...it should not be overlooked!

Celebrating 6 Years...

2010-11-14T11:07:00.000-08:00

Happy Anniversary Mom!
I hope you and Don had a wonderful weekend...celebrating 6 years! Time flies by! Congratulations!!!

Here are a few photos of your wedding.

You teach many things to all of us by how you live your life, Mom.
And celebrating 6 years of marriage doesn't come without effort, I'm sure...and a whole lot of other things:
Effort.
Patience.
Understanding.
Listening.
Talking.
Forgiving.
Faith.
Laughter.
A sense of humour.
Thoughfulness.
Asking.
Giving.
Flexibility.
And love.
Thank you for being an example of all these things and more...

Love you, Mom.
See you in just over a month!!
Crystal

"You've got two choices."

2010-11-12T20:54:00.000-08:00

Tonight, after an exhausting week that ended on a great note with a quick flight and a wonderful visit with Gwen on the plane, I arrived home, greeted by Scotia, who seemed to have had a very relaxing week....

I was also greeted with a leak in the basement that I noticed last Sunday night before I left. Rob took a look at it this week and pulled apart a few things!

And this is what he found! A big fat crack in the foundation!

I am so NOT impressed!!!
REALLY NOT IMPRESSED....just when the suite was practically perfectly ready to rent out on Vacation Rental By Owner.

I sat on the bed assessing the damage and wondering what to do now with the crack in the wall. And then Scotia wandered into the room, purring like a diesel engine. And I thought of the line I've heard you say several times in the past;

"Well, I guess you've got two choices."

And I guess I do.
Get upset. Let this crack (and the stress) bother me...or...appreciate some of the good things in my life...like Scotia, who seriously purrs so loud that it just makes me feel soooo good and then go take a shower, put on some warm clothes and get to bed.

This week, I could have made the better of 2 choices. I chose to be frustrated instead of being patient in a few situations that I wish I could 'do over'.

One thing I learned though, is to honour what I need and take care of myself instead of putting aside my needs. The only need I had was for quiet and space a bit of time alone. I didn't get what I needed b/c I simply didn't take it. It's my fault for not doing what I needed to to, in order to be my best. It's simple. If you're hungry - you eat. If you are thirsty - you get a drink of water. And if I needed some time alone b/c it was busy 24-7 all week, the time was there to take. I just didn't take it.

Tomorrow is a new day and I hope there's lots of great choices to make...
I'm so glad to be home, even if my house has a crack in it. It's not perfect. Nothing and no one is 'perfect'. This week was just another test in life; not about what happens to us, but rather, about how we respond. And while I might have passed a few tests, I failed in others this week and could have lived much more intentionally instead of just reacting.

I'll take this week as a good learning opportunity and do exactly that - learn from it.

Mom, I love you and I can hardly wait to see you at Christmas. 43 days and counting until Christmas Eve!
love Crystal

Life is SHORT!

2010-11-09T23:11:00.000-08:00

Life is SHORT! Very, very short!

Life is too short to let a day go by without finding something to be grateful for.
Life is too short not to tell those around you that we love them.
Life is too short to let circumstances or problems that arise to ruin our day.
Life is too short to blow things out of proportion and let drama reign.
Life is too short to let a moment go by without finding something to be happy about.
Life is too short to hide our gifts and talents from the world.
Life is too short to forget that we can really do anything we imagine!
And mom...life is way too short to say no to that adventure (or motorcycle ride)!

(FYI: Your grandkids were very proud of their motorcycle grandma!)

Life is too short not to hug our nephews at least 3 times when we saw them today!

And life is much too short not to do a lot of these things mentioned here!

Mom, thank you again for the wonderful weekend! I'm so grateful! And thanks for the directions tonight. Life is too short to spend so much time getting lost! Thanks for being there! We made it back! I'm exhausted! Sweet dreams! Talk to you tomorrow!

Love Crystal

Being Understood

2010-11-08T21:12:00.000-08:00

48 Hours - more than a hundred tiny moments of feeling grateful that so many of us were together and only 42 days until we're home for Christmas!

Good morning Mom,
Thank you so much for coming to visit on the weekend! I think we all appreciated it more than you could ever know!

How do you make each of us feel so loved, so important and so 'understood'? Even just a few minutes spent with you is enough to feel this validation from you.

Isn't that all we really need in life?

To feel understood.

To feel loved.

To feel important.

And to be validated.

You just sit back, take it all in, never judging or saying anything that would ever be 'taken the wrong way'. You just smile to yourself. You never try to change anyone. You just love all of us - exactly as we are.

That was amazing to see this weekend, Mom.

I can't even articulate the impact or magnitude of the 'presence' you have and the unconditional love, complete acceptance and patience you share and give to all of us. But I do know that it's rare. Even my closest friends have said, "I wish I had a mom like yours." or "You're very lucky to have a mom like you do."

It would be a big stretch to become more like you in this area Mom. I wouldn't even know where to start.

It's Tuesday morning at 5:30am and Day 1 in Edmonton went really well! Day 2 is going to be great!

We'll call you tonight.
Love Crystal

A picture is worth a thousand words...

2010-11-07T15:09:00.000-08:00

Eye to eye...at your level

2010-11-05T22:37:00.000-07:00

Mom,
OH MY GOD...it's great to see YOU!!!!!!!!!!!
You look absolutely fabulous! We've been so excited for you and the other sisters to arrive!!!!!!!!!

Tonight, among other things, I was reminded of how you get on the same level, eye to eye, with whomever you are connecting with...even if it's Gwen's bunny rabbits!

A perfect example of what makes you so remarkable in most every way!

Life's just better when you're near, Mom! We need to do this more often! I don't know what I'd do without you!
love Crystal
PS You know your banana loaf is amazing when...Gwen texts me late at night to say "Try the banana loaf! It's soooo good!"

4 Ingredients for an incredible life!

2010-11-03T07:06:00.000-07:00

It's been a fabulous week so far! Filled with all sorts of wonderful moments...the best ingredients for an incredible life!

4 Ingredients for an incredible life:
1. Family and friends
2. Exercise & eating well
3. Accomplishment and completion of goals
4. Anticipation & hope for the future

Mom, these are ingredients that you've always put into your life...surrounded by family and friends always; eating well and exercising and all that you do in your day; starting and finishing everything on your list; and always looking forward to something in the future (even when (and especially when) the present wasn't quite so easy).

I'm so grateful every day to be living across the street from Gwen. We all seem to be so happy. It' easy to help one another being so close, to be there for one another and to share day-to-day moments in life. It's true that it had to be right across the street...anything further away would have been too far.

On Monday morning I went for a 90 minute run. Now, there's several reasons why a run on a Monday morning, even in the rain, is a much-appreciated moment in life! To be healthy enough and able to run for that long is a gift. To also have the freedom to get out on a Monday morning, when most everyone else is at work is appreciated and never to be taken for granted.

Finally, I'm getting to cross some projects off my list. Getting some things accomplished, finished, DONE! is a great feeling! The VRBO suite in my house, Parecio Suerte, is finished! Painted! Carpets shampooed! New bedding in the wash and finishing touches finished tonight!!! Rob painted the suite in the rental house (which has not sold) so I'm going to rent it out for 6 months. The kitchen at the hostel is finally painted and looks amazing with the new cabinets and I'm actually getting some work projects complete too! Yay!! (Unfortunately...the garage in the new house...well, um, er...it's not really cleaned out yet!)

And my life is filled with so much amazng stuff that I can't hardly contain my excitement! The anticipation of holidays, Christmas, and future to the anticipation of family coming to visit this weekend is more than I can ask for! Anticipation offers hope, excitement, something to look forward do! And, Mom, I'm so excited for you to come visit!!!!!!!!!

I can't wait to see you! Hopefully, the fall colours and leaves will still be shining brightly on the trees when you get here! It is a gorgeous time of year!

I love you Mom! Can't wait to see you!!!!!!
Crystal

PS: It truly is an incredible day and life to get to watch a sunrise like this today!

Circumstances and people...

2010-11-01T08:01:00.000-07:00

I love this photo and quote. It's so true.

Circumstances certainly revealed who you are, Mom. I don't know anyone who could do what you have done in your life...with absolute integrity, courage and faith. Yes...circumstances certainly reveale your strength, values, commitment and loving nature. How blessed we all are to have you in our lives; the center of all of our worlds.

People and circumstances really don't make us who we are...but these things certainly do reveal who we are. Such a great message and one remember when circumstances (or people) are difficult. Those moments would be a great opportunity to reveal who I am. The best of who I am. And in the moments that I may not be my best...may they be a learning opportunity to become better.

It's Monday...and time to get out create some momentum for the day and week! I'm going to start with a big run. When I wait and put off working out, it never gets fit in. The day just slips away.

Like 'mall walking'....probably best done in the morning. :)

So...that's where this intentional day is going to start. Out for a long run. Then a call to Jim, the amazing guy who does yard work for Gwen and I. Yesterday, I attempted to do the leaves at my house, the hostel and rental with the leaf-blower. It didn't work out as planned and I realized that , "This job is way too big for me to handle." I spent almost 3 hours attempting to make a dent in the yard work only to look out the window and find today, that you can't even see what I did with so many more leaves on the ground. Yes...it's time to call for back-up.

And after a few phone calls, it will be great to get into my office, get organized and make some progress in other areas that I can actually make a difference in.

And focus on what I would do if I knew I would no fail...
Mom, I love you. And I can't wait to see you!
Thank you for revealing the best in your kids and for teaching us to do what we would do if we knew we would not fail.

love Crystal

The way we look at things...

2010-10-31T14:06:00.000-07:00

"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."

Yesterday was filled with a million wonderful moments...moments of sunshine and running by the lake pushing myself beyond what I thought I could do...moments of laughter and poking fun at myself...moments of courage where I saw those around me do the right thing...moments of friendship and great conversation...moments of joy and feeling like the most fortunate person on the planet.

It was a perfect day in most every way...with "perfect" being a matter of perspective and choice. Because...the way I look at things has a huge impact on what those things mean.

And seeing a this crazy little car with all sorts of wonderful quotes and words written all over it was a divine moment that summarized my day yesterday.

All over this car were words of hope, love and inspiration. The universe perfectly orchestrated everything about yesterday including a glimpse of this 4-wheels of joy! (I didn't get a look at who owns or was driving this car...but I wish it was me (20 years younger). :)

Mom...thank you for the grace you've given me...grace and inner confidence...to do the right thing...and ability to encourage others to do the same. Thank you for the perspective you've bestowed in me to realize that the way I look at things determines what those things mean...and thank you for the strength you've given me to change the way I look at things...b/c it's true that if I can do that, the things I'm looking at change!

Love Crystal
PS: What would you have done if this was parked in your drive way 20 years ago? Wouldn't that have been hilarious!!

Leadership and Divine Intervention

2010-10-28T22:19:00.000-07:00

There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world and that is an idea whose time has come. Victor Hugo.

As I sit here on the plane, flying home, I’m very grateful for this week; for all of the time spent; for the opportunity to make a difference and the ability and capability to influence my own future. I’m also grateful for the few frustrating moments that served to remind me of where I’m called to be and what I’m called to do. ...and how important it is for me to honour that calling.

I heard a song called “No Worries”, for the first time this week, and just can’t get it out of my mind now. The first line (repeated often) is, “I just know your life’s gonna change.” It’s just a fabulous song and in some way, for some reason, I just know it was speaking directly to me....

Two nights ago, I could not get to sleep. At 2:00am, I was still awake, with my mind filled with ideas and inspiration. Watching an amazing video clip from a movie called “Facing The Giants” earlier in the night did not help put my mind to rest either. The movie clip went something like this:

A football team was practising for a big game against a much stronger team. When one player said something discouraging that inferred they would lose in the coming game, the coach asked the player to stand up and come forward. Then he asked the player to do a drill, an exercise, that they often did in practise, and asked for one thing; for the boy to do his very best.

That was it. His very best.

And then the coach blindfolded the boy so he could not see how far he was going...so he could not see when he reached his goal.

So he would not stop when he reached his goal.

The boy started the exercise and without realizing it, passed his initial goal, and then kept going...and going...and going...and as the boy reached his maximum and did his very best, the coach was cheering loudly.

When the boy took off the blindfold and realized that he went twice as far as he thought he could, the team looked on in amazement. He thought he could make it only to the 50 yard line on the football field...but he had made it all the way across the field, to the opposite end-zone.

Then the coach spoke. Among other things, he said, “God has gifted you the gift of leadership. Don’t waste it.” The video clip was only 4 minutes long, but it will have an impact on me for a very long time, I hope.

It was very inspiring. So inspiring that at 2:00am, I was wide awake and imagining what could be possible if I didn’t stop when I reached my goals. I wonder how far I could go, the difference I could make and the impact I could have...if I would, first of all, get out of my own way in certain areas and, secondly, if I didn’t know when I arrived at “good enough”. ..and if I truly knew where I was called to be.

At 3:00am, just as I was getting to sleep, a thought came to me so clearly it was as if I was seeing it on a huge illuminated billboard. I could hear it in my ears as if someone was shouting and it startled me awake.

I've come to know this voice, which doesn't happen often, as Divine Intervention. I know it's God speaking to me. Some might think I'm a bit nutty, but I know this voice over the years and although I don't hear it often, when I do, I pay attention.

It's impossible not to. It's almost as if I don't have a choice and it's impossible to ignore.

It said, “You need to write.”

And then today, coincidentally, literally out of the blue, someone came to me and asked me to write a little booklet for them...and they'll even pay me to write it. I could do it. It would be a fun project. And I do love to write. Even if I'm not very good. I loved writing the 90 Day Challenge workbook and I think I could put together a great little booklet. We'll see. I'm going to take the weekend to regroup and think about it. I'm eager to finish some things before starting something new. However, I think I experienced a "God Wink" the other night and I don't think I can or should ignore it.

I love when those moments happen...signs from the Universe that give direction, tell you you're on your right path and give you energy (more like a jolt of lightening) to step up and honour that "gift of leadership".

Mom, you are the most amazing leader I know. You are...Courageous. Fearless. Strong. Fair. Humble. Kind. A visionary. Based in values. Encouraging. Inspiring. Empowering. Honest. You bring out the potential and gifts of all of us. And in your way, you taught us to be leaders in our own way. You truly are the most amazing leader I know.

I love you. I hope you had a great time out with everyone!! Thx for the little chats this week. Thank you for the energy you gave me this week and for being there.
Oh, and thanks for telling me to get going when I was at work late at night!! It was a bit spooky as I locked the gate and got the heck out of there.
love crystal

PS I found this in a magazine and loved what it had to say.

The Ripple Effect...of Bernie's Brilliance

2010-10-27T23:00:00.001-07:00

Mom, you really are an inspiration to so many...to all of us...your kids and grandkids...But there's more! Mom, you are an inspiration to all of our friends as well. How could our friends not be the recipients of all that you taught us, since we all spent so much time with one another when growing up.

And amazingly...not only your kids, but our friends are raising their kids with a bit of "Bernie's brilliance" too...

Tania sometimes reads your blog and emailed me today and wanted to share a few of her memories and wisdom that she gained from you over the years...

When I read what Tania wrote, I couldn't help but stop and really think about just how much of a difference you make in all of our lives, Mom. I wonder what your family who hold you as the center of our universe and the glue that keeps us all together would share if asked to offer some of the wisdom they learned from you...

Wisdom that Tania learned from you...

1) Bernice is a quitter. She quit smoking.. she quite dying her hair (all of a sudden, it wasn't black anymore, remember?)... and she quit a marriage that didn't work --- against her religion and all good sense. .. bringing you all into Regina. What a brave quit.

2) Bernice was the original motivational speaker. Remember those yellow stickies on the mirror? Where did she get that? a true original.

3) The cinnamon buns. They were good. They were plentiful. Then we all got healthy.

Tania's memories and wisdom learned from you speak so clearly to all of us...especially when we were young, growing up and finding our place in the world...

She (and you) are right:
- Quitting isn't a bad thing. Sometime's it's the very best thing to do...even if it's the hardest thing you ever did. Quitting smoking surely wasn't easy...and moving 5 kids into the city (aged 4-14) ALONE was an act of courage and grace that we're all forever thankful for! As for your hair...I remember when you let it go 'natural' and it looked great! You were, and are, stunning Mom, and perfect, exactly as you are.
- You really were and still are the most original, inspirational and motivational speaker in my world. In my lifetime, if I could be a fraction of what you are, I would truly inspire those around me to become more than they ever thought possible.
- Oh...and those cinnamon buns...Tania really is brilliant and amazing at remembering some incredible moments and memories...your cinnamon buns were famous...with all the brown sugar and coconut and rasins...YES....they were something to be savoured! Without a doubt, they were made with more love than any other ingredient!

Mom, your brilliance, influence and wisdom leave a living legacy and ripple effect that reaches beyond what either of us could likely imagine.

I love you.
Crystal
PS: A very special thank you to Tania for sharing her wisdom gained from hanging out at 7 Low Place.
PPS: Here's a photo of the group of seven (minus 2 who weren't there) who have benefited from Bernie's Brilliance over the years, too.

Be who you are!

2010-10-27T05:59:00.000-07:00

We're all sort of like marbles...virtually the same on the outside, yet so vastly unique on the inside.

Unique likes and dislikes.
Unique gifts and talents.
Unique personalities and styles.
Unique passions and callings.

It's in embracing our uniqueness and listening to our own inner voice that is important. And honouring our calling...

Oprah says...

"There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It's why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.”

As I work in Edmonton, I'm thinking about my inner calling. What I've been born to do. How I become most truly alive....

It's not by being here, I don't think. To make the point even clearer to me, as if it wasn't already, was that two people who called me from Kelowna lastnight (in different phone calls), and they asked, first thing, after I answered the phone and said hello was "What's wrong?"

Nothing's wrong. This just isn't my calling. And so I'm not really excited or alive with passion or even my usual exuberance.

For me, this is all good information. Great experience. Incredible wisdom gained.

There are parts of being here that I love. That I'm called to do. And then, there are other parts that are clearly not my passion. Now, I know that sometimes work is exactly that. Work! It's not always easy or what we want to be doing....but this is all good information for me to take and think about as I spend the week here. When I'm on the plane on Friday, going home, I'm sure it'll provide a great space and opportunity to sit back and process all of these thoughts, ideas, and where I think I'm best utilizing my gifts and honouring my calling....

Until then, I'm going to be present and focused and share my gifts and talents and be who I am, offering the very best of me, every moment of every day.

Love you, Mom.
Today - thank you for teaching me to be who I am.
See you soon,
Love Crystal

PS...and when I get back to my hotel room, I can put on my warm socks and give thanks for my mom who always left the door open for me to go after and honour my calling.

What matters most

2010-10-25T21:27:00.000-07:00

Clearly, if all our belongings can be packed up in boxes and thrown out ...what matters most in life can never be something that fits in one of those boxes.

Today, I had an opportunity to pack someone's office up b/c they are moving to a different office. As I packed up their belongings, it dawned on me that all the things we're working on, all the things we own, and all the belongings we have in our desk and even in our home....mean nothing compared to a few other things:
- how we make other people feel
- the relationships we have with the people in our lives
- our daily actions and how we live our lives

Two boxes filled with the entire contents of someone's desk (even if that desk is located in the corner office)...and even two moving-trucks loaded with the contents of a house...could never hold value or be remembered...like how we make one another feel, how we build relationships and how we live our lives through our daily actions....

I have so much yet to do, to be a better friend, to slow down some more in order to make time and space for the people in my life...but I feel grateful for the values I learned from you, Mom, and the importance of the intangible things in life. (Not including my new snazzy white chairs!) :) They're hot!! haha

Today, as I was flying from Kelowna to Edmonton, I sat back and looked out the window at the clouds, thinking about my life, loving the moment of peace, looking forward to all that doesn't fit in a box.
Love you,
See you soon.
Crystal

PS: I'm in Edmonton for the week, staying at our regular hotel where Las Vegas meets the Jetsons! There's something lovely about familiarity and knowing the lady at the front desk by name. And even more lovely...is that she asked, "Where are your sisters?"

Just Do It!

2010-10-25T07:28:00.000-07:00

Mom,
I've been wanting these gorgeous white chairs (see far side by window - in photo) for months! They're at Rona and I've been checking them out every time I'm there, buying stuff for the hostel or the house. I tried to forget about them b/c they're a bit of a luxury item and right now, I'm not spending any money on luxury anything...but I was there again over the weekend and they only had 3 left and might not order them again...so I did it! I just had to do it!

I really did try to forget about them...but something kept reminding me about them and every time I would be at Rona, I'd just have to find them and sit on them for a few minutes. Admire them. Ooogle them.

Well, I'm so glad I followed Nike's slogan of "Just Do It"!

I'll forgo eating to sit on these lovely works of art! They're low to the floor so our (short) legs have no trouble reaching the floor while sitting on them. You're going to love them!

There's probably lots of other areas in my life that I need to just do it!
- that garage still isn't finished!
- practise my guitar
- de-clutter a few things
- organize the kitchen cupboards
- organize the office
But the rest of my life is pretty amazing and the house...and the painting in the VRBO and at the Wardlaw suite is getting done this week! Things are getting done! Slowly. Steadily. I may not move too quickly sometimes...but when I'm ready, I can make things happen.

I am your daughter!

We can hardly wait to see you Mom! Thank you for coming!
We're getting the Rider Cheering Attire ready and Gwen and I are going to prepare food so all we have to do is VISIT! LAUGH! HAVE FUN and ENJOY EACHTOHER'S COMPANY!

I love my momma!
Hope all is well at home, Mom.
Thx for the chat at the airport!!
love Crystal

Idea + Fabulous Friends = Change the World!

2010-10-24T20:01:00.000-07:00

The 6th annual Great Big Run For Africa was today!!!!!!

My friend Steph, came to me 6 years ago, in 2005, and said, "I have an IDEA...and if you don't say YES...no one else will...so you have to say yes!"

That was all it took for me...feeling very special that I was the only one for some idea she had in mind. And then she told me about her idea!

Run 100km for women in Africa....inspired by our other friend Alison's speech and recent visit to Africa where she found women living in conditions we couldn't imagine, with nothing - nothing to raise their families on!

That was 5 years ago....and today was our 6th annual "Great Big Run For Africa". We didn't run the whole 100km this time. Just 10km each for everyone one the relay and we laughed and chatted with fellow-runners or in the RV. I couldn't stay all day b/c I had to get ready to go to Edmonton tomorrow but it was a great day!!!

Here's a photo from last year when we finished!

Our other friend, Nicole, kept the dream of our run alive this year by taking on much of the work on her own when the rest of us said that maybe the natural course of the run had taken it's course....and the run went well. Next year, I said it was my turn and volunteered to be the lead organizer. Next year...we're going to take the run to a whole new level! I'm not sure of a financial fundraising goal...but I made a commitment and was intentional about it.

I think it's what I was called to do. I knew it before today, when we almost let our effort of the past 5 years be forgotten.

I'm excited to see where we could take the event that we've all come to love - for the cause...and for the chance for old friends to reconnect...something that some of us only do once a year on our Great Big Run day!

I feel grateful to be surrounded by such inspiring and strong women...who are filled with ideas AND who bring them to life, balancing families, work and their personal lives at the same time.

It makes me realize that anything is possible...even changing the world...if we have an idea and a group of fabulous friends to help us bring it to life!

Mom, love you.
Thank you for who you are and for telling me when I was in highschool, "Be careful who your friends are and who you spend your time with." You were so right!
Love Crystal

2010-10-23T09:06:00.002-07:00

The class I was blessed to work with this past week was, indeed, the absolute best class I've taught in a decade! And I think I was a better facilitator because of them and how extraordinary they were.

They were focused. Determined. Honest. Genuine. Supportive of one another and of me. Passionate about their business ideas. Talented and skilled at their own expertise. Eager to learn. Eager to share their ideas. And they all had great senses of humour and created a dynamic and fun atmosphere.

The entire week was just one great day after another and the excellent discussion, the ideas generated and the pure JOY that was present every day astounded me! This was, after all, a business program.

I implemented some new ideas throughout the week, tried some new stuff and did things a little differently than usual. (I think I'll continue to do those different things in the future.)

This incredible week made me realize how important it is not to get stuck in my old way of doing things, the way I've always done them...and it gave me confidence to add new and unique concepts (that I love) to my week, that, although are related to business, are actually much more about the "bigger picture" in life....like dreams...joy...happiness... and our purpose or calling.

I think we're all called to do something great in life...not just 'get by'.

I was exhausted by Friday night b/c it was such a big week...and I gave it everything I had. Most days, I arrived to my classroom and never left, until the end of the day, even to go to the washroom. It was just non-stop from the moment I arrived until the moment I said, at the end of the day "My brain has reached it's capacity for the day. I don't know about yours. Get out of here." And then I would bolt to the washroom, realizing I had not gone all day b/c I was so busy and focused on what we were doing all day.

I still remember the day, decades ago, when I was in university and Kate was teaching a class in Saskatoon to some other teachers...and she was at the overhead projector (we don't use those any more) and I stood at the very back of the room and thought to myself, "I want to be like her and do what she's doing one day." I distinctly remember her red dress that went to just above the knee with short sleeves. Funny...Cindy has a blue dress I think that's very similar and I bought a navy blue dress exactly the same.

This morning, as I revamped my workbook, in preparation for the next program, I am excited to bring new and innovative ideas to the program and not just keep them in my other non-business programs. Business and life are not so separate. They're really one and the same...and it's our 'business that should serve us. We are not meant to be a servant to our business.'

Mom, I learned this from you. When we were little, playing in the tires at the tire shop, where you were doing the books, it seemed, even then, that it wasn't about a job or the books. It was a part of your life...but not your life.

Thank you for helping me to see the big picture...that work and business are to serve our lives, family and dreams...we really aren't meant to be a servant (for too long) to the business.

Love you,
Crystal

Intentional Eating

2010-10-22T06:46:00.000-07:00

I'm teaching my business program in Penticton this week and the class I have just might be the very best class I've ever had in 10 years. It's been a joy to show up every day and be a part of the positive learning, the lightbulb-moments, the focus on their business ideas and inspiration to create an incredible future.

One of the participants makes her own alternative health items including protien bars, nut-milk, granola and crackers. An amazing person and brilliant individual...she gave me a couple cookbooks to look at overnight about unique and different recipes and information.

I learned so much.

The cookbooks are by Rose Vasile.

I'm totally inspired to learn some new ways to cook and eat.
She has a big list of food staples that we should have in our cupboards and fridge.
(Mom - your fridge and cupboards are full of these items!)

Food staples:
almonds, beets, carob powder, carrots, celery, dates, dulse (what's this?), flax seeds, fruit, green onions, greens, hemp seeds, lemon and limes, parsley, pecans, pumpkin seeds, quinoa, rasins, seeds for sprouting (I'm learning about this!), sesame seeds, steel cut oats, sunflower seeds, all kinds of spices,

Interesting stuff:
- you need to soak nuts (all nuts) in water, for different lengths of time depending on the nut, to release the enzymes in the nut...so, for example, if you soak almonds overnight, for 12 hours, when you eat them, you get 50% more enzymes out of them (nutrition for the body!).
There's so many interesting tid-bits in the books.

I think I'm going to buy these books for my Christmas gift exchange item for our Christmas family get-together!

Mom, love you!
I wish I would have paid closer attention to what you make and your recipes when I lived at home!!
love Crystal

I don't have to...I get to.

2010-10-20T19:50:00.000-07:00

I don't have to work out. I get to.

When I got home from a big day of teaching in Penticton along with a 2 hour drive (there and back) the very LAST thing I wanted to do today was go for a run.

But I didn't go out yesterday and on Monday, I only went out for a 30 min run. So...I really needed to get out there. But I just didn't want to go. What I really wanted to do was lay on the couch, channel-surf and have a snack (or do all 3 at once).

Seriously the very last thing I wanted to was ANYTHING!

This isn't like me. Usually I'm eager to get out and exercise, especially when I'm training for something or it's a gorgeous day outside. Now, I'm not currently training for anything but it was nearing the end of a gorgeous day!! So...much to my mind's stalling, my body found it's own way to get on some running clothes and lace up my shoes...and get out there.

I didn't want to. I didn't have to. But I certainly GET to. It is a privilege to be able to run...and one that I needed to remind myself of today. If I have to be honest, I needed a whole lot more than reminding...I needed a kick in the ass out the door!

It's funny how it happens...but when one good thing happens, it seems to create a domino effect for more great things to happen!

When I got back from my run, 2 contractors came to look at the house for painting and electrical work that I want done (painting the lower level) and pot lights/replacing fixtures upstairs) and their prices were reasonable! So...the lower level gets painted next week! Before Cindy and Kate arrive! Yay! Yay! Yay! It's going to look gorgeous!!!

And Rob is going to paint the upstairs as he has time between his other work.

Perfect!

Today has been a fantastic day for lots of things!!
I think we finalized our location for the next DIVA Retreat to be held next April 10-17th, 2011...at Casa Des Los Suenos (www.casasuenos.com) on Isla Mujeres in the Caribbean ocean!!

Oh my GOD....isn't this amazing!!!!!!!

Mom...thank you so much for whatever it is that you instilled in all of us, and in me, that seems to be resilient and able to stand up when we fall down...to try again when something doesn't work out...to shift from "having" to...to "getting" to.
I love you!
Can't wait to see you!
I still wish you were able to come out in a couple weeks!
love Crystal
PS: And...as I sat here writing all this, a bouquet of roses came to my door....for me! Yes - me!

Thank you Mom, for EVERYTHING and thank you God for being selective in the prayers you answered.

Just the way you are...

2010-10-20T06:42:00.000-07:00

There's this great new song called "Just the way you are" and it's bright and happy...and the lyrics are lovely.

Written for you.

Me.

Everyone.

Because you are amazing...just the way you are!

Thank God for people in our lives that make us all feel that we are amazing. For this - I am grateful!

Mom, thanks for making us feel that we were (and are) amazing...just the way we are. You always made us feel good about ourselves. I don't remember a time (EVER) where you made me feel unworthy or not good about myself. (Well...unless I did something blatantly wrong...and then you certainly put me in my place - with reason!...like that time when I snuck out when I was about 16 and you were at bingo...and I swept the skiff of snow off the steps to erase my footprints...and you knew (obviously) that someone had been out! haha! We were never as smart as we thought we were!)

Mom,you're wonderful. And amazing. Just the way you are!
Have a great day and talk with you soon,
love Crystal

Just the way you are - Bruno Mars

Oh her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think she don't see what I see

But every time she asks me do I look okay
I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all day if she'd let me
Her laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think its so sexy

She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day

Oh you know, you know, you know
Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same

So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are

The simpliest of things...

2010-10-19T06:48:00.000-07:00

...can be the most beautiful if we only stop to notice.
To wake up and be able to jump out of bed and be healthy with so much to look forward to and so many people to love around me...it is truly a beautiful morning!
I love you, Mom.
Congratulations on the walking!
Love Crystal
PS:

An unexpected path to almost everything.

2010-10-17T09:32:00.000-07:00

The sun is shining on another glorious morning and the view is almost blinding over the water!
And I'm getting a head start on Christmas already! But I need your help!
I want to make socks or something...and am a little lost! Where's my momma when I need her? haha...

Actually...that's no joke! I'm serious!!
I need my momma! And not just to help me with this knitting! :)

Thanks for the little chat yesterday and today. Great to speak with you Mom. I miss you!
....

I'm reading this great book right now called, "Women Food and God: an unexpected path to almost everything.". It's very good! I wanted to read it for myself and my own sake and also for our DIVA Retreats since food and body/weight issues are something that most women grapple with.

One chapter is entitled, "If Love Could Speak" and it talks about the following...

Eating when you're hungry...eat what your body wants, stop when you've had enough...and take off the 'boots' (stories, thoughts, self-defeating things we say to ourselves) that are holding us down from soaring in a new world (where we love and accept ourselves, our bodies and allow our spirit to shine).

The book goes on to say that

Food and eating isn't the problem with weight...and the obsession over food and the body isn't about something you do; it's about knowing who you are. It's about knowing what sustains you and what exhausts you. What you love and what you think you love because you believe you can't have it.

Eating should be about nourishing the body.
If love could speak...what would it say?
Trust the process, trust your longing for freedom. Eventually you will stop wanting to do anything that interferes with the increasing brightness you have come to associate with being alive. And rest assured that like the butterfly that flutters its wings in one part of the world and int causes a hurricane in another, every time a woman aligns her eating with relaxation, every time she takes off her damn boots, the laces fly open for the rest of us.

IF Love Could Speak Instructions:
1. Eat when you are hungry.
2. Eat sitting down and in a calm environment. This does not include the car.
3. Eat without distractions. Distractions include radio, TV, newspapers, books, anxiety producing conversations or music.
4. Eat what your body wants.
5. Eat until you are satisfied.
6. Eat (with the intention of being) in the full view of others.
7. Eat with enjoyment, gusto and pleasure.

The book is amazing! And the tag line, "An unexpected path to almost everything." is quite poetic. The book is really about the relationship we have with ourselves, not only with food.

You could have written this book in many ways, Mom. You look fabulous! After 10 kids! Seriously - amazing! How do you look so good? You eat what nourishes you. You eat when you're hungry and stop when you've had enough. You eat at the table and taught us to do these same things. I hated beets until you told me they were good for me. Same for brussel sprouts. You rarely eat treats (I must get that from Dad!) and you take time to listen to what your body needs.

Thank you for your influence, for all your recipes and for being such a big part of the path to almost everything.

I love you,
Crystal

Now that's more like it!

2010-10-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

It's amazing what one can accomplish...if they make the friggin' list and follow it!
Yup. Who knew?

After being disorganized, spinning my wheels and not getting nearly enough checked off my list...I finally got sick and tired of going in circles and got some things DONE!

Thank you Mom and God for giving me a shallow bottom to my barrel.

To start the day, yesterday morning Gwen and I went to do 10 flights of stairs at Bear Creek Park. We counted one flight...147 steps. If we round up to 150...that's 1500 steps climbed. We had such a good time. Then we hiked the 2km loop and talked, laughed and celebrated just being alive, healthy and able to be out there hiking at 9am on a Friday.

After that I went to the rental and took a load to the Salvation Army and then loaded up a car full of bankers boxes (with work papers over the past 7 years) that were stored in the garage...and took them to my house...and now there's only one (yes...one) car load left there!

I had a big conversation with the realtor as well and he says I have to cut the price more on the house that I'm trying to sell. I asked for comparables. I called other Realtors who's signs I saw in the neighbourhood that had "sold" signs on them...and their prices were higher than my house price! So...I'm not lowering the price... My gut says - Paint it. Fix up the few deficiencies and the house will sell.

It's funny...when you put a bit of energy towards something....magic happens. It's also empowering. Life just feels better. It feels like being stuck in the mud and then getting 'un-stuck'. Crossing off a few things off my list yesterday was like closing a door that was letting all the heat out of the house. Or....closing a hole that was sucking my energy out.

Just a few little things crossed off my list feels so much better. Thank you GOD!

And then I went to the hostel, got the new computer running properly after hours and hours of frustration!

And now the ball is rolling in other areas as well! I realize that I'm not suppossed to stare endlessly at colour chips, confused and undecided,...so an interior designer is coming over to the house today to pick colours for the vacation rental and my living space. I couldn't pick the right colours if my life depended on it...so rather than stagnate any longer, I called someone to help me.

Maybe that's what it's about (and perhaps I needed a little reminder) that when I need help, I just have to call someone to help me. And sometimes...I simply need to get up and help myself.

Mel and I also decided to find a new location for the DIVA Retreat in Mexico. I was supposed to send my credit card to our original location to pay the deposit...but I just couldn't do it. Finally, I told Mel that something was stopping me from sending our deposit. There were a few factors that were not perfect about that location as well, so it just didn't feel right. Over the past few days, we have been looking for new locations...and OH MY GOD! There are some amazing places out there!

This one is our favourite!!

We'll see.

For now, I'm off to get that last load from the house and make a plan to get things in order there...put up a few curtains in the art room, maybe paint the inside of the garage...and see if I can get the exterior of the house painted this late in the year...and then...I have faith that my little beach house will sell at the price I want it to.

One thing is for sure, Mom,...you have a very stubborn daughter! Probably, it's not always a good thing...but occasionally, it's not a bad attribute.

Thank you for listening, Mom.
This is more like it!
Love you,
Crystal

Where Have YOU Been?

2010-10-14T20:08:00.001-07:00

This is a question I'm asking myself right now...and one I remember you asking when we were teen-agers!

Where have you been?

Days and weeks have flown by and I've been busy with so many projects...but it feels like I'm jugging too many things right now and nothing is getting completed properly.

Living intentionally has gone out the window this week!

Work, selling the house (an unanswered prayer...still!), organizing my vacation rental suite downstairs (slow on my tight budget!), the hostel (it's like it's got magnets glued all over it and I'm made of metal...I just get sucked in there and never leave). (Sort of like the customers...so that's not really a bad thing now is it?) And then there's the gala, the next DIVA Retreat, trying to maintain some sort of exercise and health (how is it possible to have had such good intentions of my 6 pack summer and it's not summer anymore and my 6 pack still hasn't arrived...not by a long shot!). And it would be nice to have some sort of 'life', too.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed right now...not doing a very good job of juggling at all. And certainly not living as intentionally as I would like to be!

All in all, I bring myself back to my center as I write this and realize that I've been going in circles...in my mind and in life...getting wound up, frazzled and going too fast to slow down enough to regroup, focus, get settled and slowly, methodically, accomplish one thing at a time. I guess this is all a process. There is no finite end or finish line when it comes to being intentional. It's a work in progress...at least it is for me...and although I have not seen you in SOOOOO long Mom, I hope that there's little parts of you that come through in me and my busy life that help to bring me back to center, to myself...and show me where I am so that I don't have to ask myself, "Where the heck have you been?"

A friend of mine is great at making lists, worksheets and prioritizing details. And this is a skill that many people have. Even me. I can make lists, get organized and create worksheets almost as good as the best of them...but this, this is only step one. Step 1 is only part of the equation...and it's the easy part. Step 2...my friend is also very good at that! VERY! I could learn a few things here beause at step 2...now that's where I stumble...that's where I have to follow my damn list that I made!

STEP 1: Make the list!

STEP 2: Follow it. Dammit!

It's really so very simple. Make the list. Then follow it.

If I can do this, then I'll know where I've been. I would be on that page, working smarter, not harder, somewhere between all the crossed-off, check marked, scribbled out, complete and finished projects...doing the happy dance of joy that only comes with hard work, discipline and focus.

Mom, I love you, miss you and need a little bit of you right now!
It's a good thing you're not coming out right now though ...YOU would probably be put to work! Either that...or YOU would be the Master of the List...and WE would all be put to work.
Yes...that's probably the way it would work.
I love you!!
Crystal

Note to self - stretch!

2010-10-13T09:10:00.000-07:00

Mom,
On Thanksgiving weekend, Gwen, Charlotte (a friend of ours) and I went to Bear Creek Park to run the stairs. The stairs were sort of like in this photo although I didn't have a camera so this photo is just from the internet but it looked very similar...and just as steep!
The stairs were over 100 steps to go up. Gwen said they were closer to 140...I am not sure. I lost count!
We ran up and down the stairs 6 times and then hiked the 2km loop that went up, over and around the creek and then back down to the car.

We had so much fun!!!

Until the next day...and the day after that! Today, my calves are still so sore that it hurts to walk down any stairs. Going up is OK but going down is not easy! I feel more sore than when I've done a triathlon! I spoke to Gwen yesterday and we both laughed at our sore calves.

Note to self: stretch!

We're planning a big friend stair-climbing session on Friday. I'm not sure that I'm ready! Maybe one or two sets...but that's about it! Maybe I can be there for moral support and cheering! I'll let you know how it goes!! Gwen's so excited about it! It's a big work-out and will be so much fun with a bunch of people!

Next time, I think we should stretch though. Take a few minutes at the end. Stop. Stretch. Slow down. And take it easy.

One thing is for sure...all things are more fun, more enjoyable and more worthwhile when surrounded by friends and family.

Running over 800-900 steps alone would be very hard...but with friends and family...we just laughed the entire time!

Well...we laughed at that time but I certainly wasn't laughing the next day!

I can hear you saying, "Well, why don't you just go do that again!"
:)
Love you, Mom.
See you soon!
Crystal

Bliss-Dream-Spirit-Love

2010-10-11T10:24:00.000-07:00

At dinner lastnight, we each selected a few little cards that have wonderful messages in them. I randomply picked two for you and Don and opened them up for you.

Some of the other messages were:

"Seek not outside yourself, heaven is within."

"If I had my life to live again, I'd find you sooner."

"Be strong, go with your heart and believe in miracles because anything - anything can happen."

"Then we sat on the edge of the earth, with our feet dangling over the side, and marveled that we had found each other."

"These are the magic years...and therefore magic days...and therefore magic moments."

And then we spent the evening laughing, eating, laying on the livingroom floor and giving thanks...for family, friends and all the bliss, dreams, spirit and love in our lives.

Love you, Mom,
Crystal

I Am...

2010-10-10T12:51:00.000-07:00

I am my mother's daughter!
I can bake like you wouldn't believe!

And make a mess like you could believe!

And clean it all up in 7 minutes flat while the flapper pie is in the oven with the merangue turning a golden colour!

Love you, Mom.
Thank you for the recipe! This time - I measured!
Crystal

Giving Thanks

2010-10-10T07:52:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom!
With so much to be thankful for today (and everyday), we're wishing you and Don a very happy Thanksgiving. Tonight, we're at Gwen's for a turkey dinner and flapper pie!! We wish you and Don were here, Mom. Very much. We'll call you tonight!!

Scotia's been pacing the hallway wondering if Plan B is going to materialize!! :) She's looking forward to seeing you!!!
As the weather changes today (it's raining), it's a perfect morning to sit inside and think of all that I'm thankful for...
- our family
- health (how lucky we are to all be so healthy!)
- the friendship our family shares and how we all like to spend time together
- all the encouragement and support we give one another
- there's always someone to call and talk to in our family
- freedom and opportunity to follow our own path
- wonderful friends
- abundance
- the freedom to make my own choices and decisions
- for the chance to make a difference in the world
- the ability to live in one of the safest, cleanest countries in the world
- faith
- our upbringing and how you raised us
- I'm thankful for all of these things and more...
- for my spirit, mind and body (and bright smile and big teeth)
- for second chances and "do over's" and for how life has a wonderful way of working out
- for all the people that love me and see me for who I really am
- for living across the street from Gwen...I'm very thankful for this
- I'm thankful (so very thankful) to be born into our family and that you're my mom

I could go on and on Mom. I have so much to be thankful for. Thank you for every part of this wonderful life, Mom. Thank you for you.
Happy Thanksgiving!!
Love you (and Don)
Crystal

Intentional Decisions

2010-10-09T08:11:00.000-07:00

Today is the Hawaii Ironman championship. I put my name in for the lottery and got in but decided a couple months ago that I didn't want or need to go.

Surprisingly, the decision not to go and race was very easy...even though it's the most challenging sporting event in the world and (for those that aren't fast enough to qualify...like me), I'd received one of the most sought after lottery spots.

Just finishing the race in August did make the decision easier as well, because doing a race 6 weeks later would be beyond difficult, to say the least.

I'm watching the live video feed of the pre-race right now and happy to be doing so from afar, rather than being one of those 2000 athletes getting ready to jump in the water in 30 minutes.

A very cool intentional decision. Thanks Mom! If I hadn't been focusing on living more intentionally, I'm sure I'd be there simply because I'd gotten an opportunity to go...not because I truly, intentionally wanted to be there.

I think I've almost made some other decisions about racing next year ...not that you want to hear them, Mom,...but..maybe Ironman Canada next August and what do you think of Ironman Western Australia next December? Some friends are doing that race...and it is supposed to be a gorgeous course!! We'll see! You'll be the first to know!

Now, on to more relevant decisions...choosing paint colours for the house and vacation rental downstairs. I have no idea what colours to choose! I think I need some professional help from a decorator or designer.

And what to do on this beautiful Saturday...
- put something good into my mind...I'm reading two good books right now: Women, Food and God ...and Spark: the revolutionary new science of exercise and the brain
- put something good into my body...I'm doing a test run of your amazing pumpkin pie today in preparation for Sunday dinner at Gwen and Robs!!
- get some exercise...going for a run later
- and focus a little on my 'calling' and what I'm meant to be doing in my life....work on the garage, spend a little time on my book and 15 min on the guitar

So...what do you think of Plan B? :) Gwen and I still have our fingers crossed and hearts hoping!!!

love you,
Crystal

What if?

2010-10-08T08:47:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, Eric and I watched the movie Pay It Forward. He hadn't seen it before. I've watched it at least a dozen times. And every time, I cry my eyes out at the end. Such an inspiring movie. Yet so sad at the same time. I guess that's what makes it such a great movie...

It evokes emotion and makes me wonder...what could be possible. It makes me ask the question, "What if?"

What if it were really true...and what if we each did 3 little "random acts of kindness" in a big way? What could happen? What sort of difference could it make?

If you do the math, after only 60 days of Paying Forward good deeds, 10,460,353,203 good deeds would have been carried out! That's ten and a half billion good deeds! And only 60 days....

What if?

Watching the movie reminds me of the website I made years ago to promote random acts of kindness. It makes me think of how I could make a bigger difference with it. I'm revamping it now and making it more simple. And setting it up so people can submit their stories easier. It's going to be way better.

Living intentionally today means leveraging what I've got, rather than starting something new. It means STILL CROSSING MY FINGERS ABOUT PLAN B (I hope you and Don can come a the end of October)!!! And it also means daydreaming about what could be possible if we surround ourselves with the right people, add a little inspiration and emotion, say what's on our mind/in our hearts and ask the question, "What if?"

Love you, Mom.
Crystal

Plan B

2010-10-07T10:43:00.000-07:00

What do you think of Plan B?
I was out for a run yesterday and it came to me that this plan just might be as good or better than the original plan!! You would have 4 of your girls here...just think of the fun we'd have!!!

And the timing of the Rider game is PERFECT!!

Life's not always perfect and it seems, sometimes, that just when we plan for something, it doesn't quite work out how we hope it will. But, Mom, you're the very best and creating an even better "Plan B" and no matter what the plan is over the next couple weeks,you've taught us so well to have hope and make the best of any situation.

Thank you for all of these little life lessons that you've inspired all of us to follow and learn from. I sure hope we can make this plan b work out....

Gwen and I are going to cross our fingers!!
love you both,
Crystal

An invisible string...

2010-10-06T09:41:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
Thinking of you and Don this morning, sending you lots of wishes and good thoughts.
Gwen and I are so sad that you aren't able to make it out, but we'll be home soon for Christmas and I can hardly wait! Please tell Don that he's in all of our thoughts.

In the interim, it's good to know that even though we're not all in the same city, we're all connected to one another with an invisible string made of love, strength, hope and friendship that is stronger than anything.

More to come later today.

Later...
After working this morning and focusing on some projects that I need to finish, I'm taking a little break and then going for a long run in the sun. When I get back, I'm making soup with some vegi's that I bought from the vegi farm (out on Benvoulin Rd). The pumpkins there are HUGE!

We really wish you and Don were coming out next week to celebrate Thanksgiving, the Rider game and our wonderful family! Gwen and I are really sending Don the vibes today (and every day) and we hope he knows how much he's loved.
Mom, you are the greatest at looking at the bright side of things...and that's just what we're all to do, I guess. Look at the bright side...and rely on that invisible string when we need to.

I love you, Mom.
Missing you today.
Always here for you Mom and forever connected...
Love Crystal

2 Simple Instructions from the Hawaiian Surfer

2010-10-04T18:16:00.000-07:00

The course this weekend was amazing!!!

Gwen and I made it home around mid-night lastnight after a long drive home.
We made the 6pm ferry which was awesome. We had a reservation for the 5pm but it was cancelled. Luckily they moved us to the 6pm ferry b/c there was a 2 sailing wait and we would not have gotten out until 10:00pm if we didn't have a reservation.

Then, once in Vancouver, we found or way, we got lost, we almost got to the USA border and then we finally got back on track...arriving home safe and sound, just a little tired.

It was a fantatic weekend! I don't even know where to start to tell you about it!

One of the siimplest yet most profound points the instructor mentioned has stuck with me. Two simple instructions that hear learned from a Hawaiian.

Number 1:
Remember who you are.
Number 2:
Step into your power.

Sounds easy...but is it really?

This is wisdom that you could have shared in exactly those words - simple and to the point. You certainly instilled these instructions in us, growing up.

Even with you as a parent, the most amazing Mom in the world, it's not easy to do these things though...at least not from my experience or what I see around me. Even in my business classes, my students think their greatest problem is finding the money. My response to that it, "If you really had everything else together, the money would find you." Then, in my classes we talk about the real things holding us back...like fear, bad timing, lack of skills, resources or confidence and other things like not knowing where to start or lacking the courage to know where to start and even the not so simple task of simply taking a leap of faith.

The course this weekend was totally enlightening in many ways and I can't wait to learn more. It's a blend of psychology and kinesiology (a fancy word for muscle testing and how the body responds to certain mental/emotional thoughts. Totally up my alley. I felt like I was right at home!

Anyway, more on that later.
For now, I've got to practise my guitar. Gwen was a star on her uki. She was going to teach me a few things but when I tried to tune my guitar with her uki tuner (and my lack of ability) it didn't work out very well and I had to take it in to the music store today to ask them to tune it. Suffice it to say that, right now, you'd want me to play with "earphones" like on the organ, if you could hear me!

:)
Love you, Mumsy!
Can't wait to see you!!!
Crystal

It's all about our thoughts...and beliefs!

2010-10-02T21:34:00.000-07:00

This little poem is amazing...and life is, indeed, about our character, as the title suggests...but it's even more about our thoughts...
and
beliefs!

Gwen and I are at this amazing workshop this weekend in Victoria and it's all about our beliefs, thoughts, stuff inside our brain...and how that has a huge impact on EVERYTHING that happens in life!

There are a million quotes said about "thoughts" and "beliefs".

We become what we think about most of the time...

Thoughts are things...

Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it will achieve...

We won't see it...until we believe it.

It was an amazing day! So much learning, so much great information, and so much familiarity!

When I was about 20, I wanted to learn more about kinesiology, muscle testing, the power of the mind and how our beliefs influence our lives. Then I sort of lost touch with this inner calling and finished university, went on to move to Kelowna, etc. and time went by.

I always remembered my interest in muscle-testing, the power of unconscious thoughts and positive thinking and how "our perception is our reality"...but never focused on these things specifically.

Well, today was sort of like "coming home" for me. Even the facilitator and some of the other participants seemed oddly familiar. It was fascinating.

I knew I was meant to be here. It was as if I could finish the sentences of the facilitator. I knew what he was going to say before he finished saying it. I can often feel what someone is feeling or I can sometimes receive an awareness of other people's thoughts...not really reading their thoughts...just sort of intuitively being aware of what is going on. (Of course...there are other times when I'm so absorbed with myself that I have no clue what anyone around me is thinking or feeling!)

Regarding the intuitive moments I experience, I know I get this from you, Mom. Except that you have this gift in a much more powerful way than I do. (The not so intuitive moments...the self-absorbed times...we both know where I get that from! kidding!)

Anyway, it was an extraordinary day! I loved every moment! I'm here in bed, feeling so happy to be here! Gwen is out with Britta for the evening. I'm so excited for tomorrow!

I find it interesting that I'm finally here, studying what I was drawn to so many years ago. I believe in my heart that this is a piece of what I am called to do in my life's work. I did know this years ago, too, but I guess the timing wasn't right until now.

I have faith that everything unfolds in life as it's meant to. And my life seems to be unfolding in ways that I dreamed of, prayed about and wished for.

Thank you Mom - for encouraging me to dream!
Thank you God - for hearing every word in every prayer I've uttered!
And thank you universe - for all the stars (and 4-leaf clovers) I've wished upon!

I love you Mom.
Crystal

3 Little Things When Going On A Road Trip

2010-10-01T06:38:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
Sorry I've been away...working in Penticton all week and now in Victoria with Gwen! Great to talk to you en route!! Love you. This is a photo of the sunset we saw from the car as we drove. It was a gorgeous drive. Gwen drove the entire way. She's amazing. I was so tired of driving after driving to/from Penticton all week. I sat in the passenger seat making snacks for her and we laughed and talked the whole way! Oh my God, we had fun. We left very early and had over an hour of time to relax and wait at the ferry terminal.

Living intentionally:
1. plan ahead: we made a reservation on the ferry so we could be first in line and get on the ferry with no worries. The 9pm sailing was the last one and we didn't want to miss it.
2. leave early: we left early and had lots of extra time in case of any problems on the road. There were no problems and the weather was perfect but it was nice to have some extra time and not worry about a thing.
3. leave the radio off: we didn't turn on the radio once. We just talked and laughed the whole way. 4 hours of sister visiting and fun. We both feel so blessed - for a bit of sister time; to live so close to one another and to come from such an amazing family.

love you,
will write tonight,
love Crystal

Going against the grain...

2010-09-28T22:08:00.000-07:00

Mom,
I had a simple but totally totally awesome revelation today...and it reminded me of you.
This week, I'm driving to Penticton all week for work. I leave in the morning, heading against the much larger flow of traffic that is heading into town and I have a smooth, very un-crowded drive south. Then, on the way home, I head back to Kelowna at the end of the day, when everyone else is leaving Kelowna. It's a lovely drive...against the flow of traffic.

It made me think of life...and how it's often wiser to go against the grain, and behave in ways that are opposite of the rest of the masses.

For example, when everyone else is selling their houses...perhaps I should not be selling mine....but rather - buying theirs. It's a buyer's market right now, after all.

Or when everyone else is buying stocks for investments...maybe I should not be so quick to buy, right along with them, but sell instead.

Or, when someone is selling a run-down business that has seen better days...and nobody will even look in that direction or consider it's viability because the opportunity is disguised as a 'dump'...only to be revealed and discovered through vision and hard work! Yes...that's the time to jump in and seize the opportunity...like the hostel almost 12 years ago...when everyone else is running in the other direction. Thank God nobody wanted to buy it back then, leaving it for sale for almost a year before we came cross it. I can't believe no one saw the opportunity there, just underneath the surface.

In our family, we learned to go against the grain, not to blindly follow and that "opportunity is often disguised as hard work" and great things don't always come easy and they're not always shiny and new.

I think it's that way with a lot of things. The value in a building, any item and even in people might be hidden or concealed...and we just have to uncover it to see it...Polish it up, refinish the surface areas and then look at it shine. Or...with people...listen to them, pay attention to the details, validate their concerns rather than minimize them, show that we care...show just a little thoughtfulness...and then watch them shine.

Now that's amazing.

I know this is what happens...b/c people in my life = family, friends, loved ones, God...seem to be polishing me until I shine.

Mom, thank you for polishing us till we shine...by loving us, by showing us that opportunities are often concealed as hard work and by showing us to go against the grain and not just follow the masses.

love you,
Crystal

Finish strong.

2010-09-27T20:28:00.000-07:00

When I was training for my first Ironman, back in 2001, my coach said, "Save a little energy so that you finish strong."

He went on to say that "how you feel at the end of your race...whether you're happy and full of energy....or tired, exhausted and beaten by the day...that will have a lasting impression on you forever...much more than what the finish clock says."

I was pretty scared, in that first race, unsure of what to expect or how the day would go. So I saved a lot of energy for the end. And feeling good, feeling happy, enjoying my family and friends who were all down to cheer...now that did have a huge impact on me. Feeling good gave me lots of opportunity to enjoy the day and enjoy the finish...and celebrate with everyone. It's always left a wonderful memory etched in my mind and spirit, when I think of the past.

Maybe I should have tried harder - in that race. And in everything in my life. I know I certainly do "save a little" just in case. I'm not sure I lay it all out on the table...or on the line...until now. Lately, it's felt great to give life all I've got...whether it's out in the jungle or other areas of my life. Not that I'm perfect...I'm certainly not. I could be a better friend, not drop so many balls (and I drop a fair few!), and be more focused and more organized and be more thoughful and follow through a bit more on things...and I could go on and on forever here...but I'm trying...trying to finish unfinished things on my long list as well as lay it all on the line a little more.

And...I'm going to give the last 3 months of this wonderful year of intentional living the best I've got...and finish strong. I can't believe the past 9 months have gone by so fast. I can hardly believe all that's happened over the past year...all the wonderful, terrific and amazing things, experiences and moments.

It's overwhelming to look back and see how far we've come!

Even still, I can say that I probably could have done more. Tried harder. Been more focused....

BUT...that's life. (And it feels good to just "tag that toe and let it go" when it comes to feeling guilty...

OH! LIghtbulb moment....living intentionally might be about living guilt-free... forgiving myself and letting myself off the hook a little for not being perfect...and just letting go of the past...

Wow! Wouln't that be amazing! Wouldn't that help people finish strong...I know it would certainly help me!

I'm here now...and I'm going to finish strong!

I love you Mom. Thank you for making it OK that I'm not perfect and that a race finish time or medal or even finishing doesn't mean anything to you...all that mattered to you was that I made it out of the swim alive and was happy...which was an example to me that it's OK to save a little so I finish strong and not get too wrapped up in running someone else's race (or trying to keep up to someone else's pace). All that matters is running my own race, at my own pace and doing the best I can in this moment.

And, truly, every day, I think we all do the best we can on that day - in that moment - and it's really pointless to say or think or feel, "Oh, I could have done better." Because...really...if we could have done better...we would have done better.

Tonight, I made a little island on the living room floor with a big blanket after I got home from teaching in Penticton. And then, I got a few books, a couple pillows, my laptop and the phone...and I stayed on the island reading, talking to Amelie on the phone for an hour, writing a few emails to friends and playing with Scotia.

I love being on the "island"... in touch and out of reach.

And a little island time is a great way to get back to my center so that I can finish strong.

I love you.
See you soon!
love Crystal

Give a little...take a little

2010-09-26T16:22:00.000-07:00

Give a little...
On Saturday I gave a speech to some runners in a "learn to run" clinic at the Running Room on goal-setting and motivation. I feel so honoured to be asked to give a speech (whether I'm paid in cash or in 30% off coupons for new runners) because there's just something so humbling, for me, in that people want to hear what I have to say.

Who knew?

Most (if not all) of what I've learned has been through experience...and it's so true that most "experience" is either gained by trial and error or through making mistakes or by sheer luck (and I'm lucky to be pretty lucky).

In my speech, I told the group some of my trials and tribulations...and how I've learned quite a bit of how to do things right...by first, doing them wrong. Completely wrong!

I shared my experience of learning to run...and my first marathon...when I was on a training run with a friend (14 years ago) and it the 20 mile run, the last big run before the race, and I had 2 gatorade bottles that I was carrying...and I didn't want to carry them both...so I drank one whole bottle of gatorade before starting the run, so I wouldn't have to carry it. It seemed like good logic at the time, but about two hours in to the run, things started to go sideways...

I bonked.

The big sugar rush (of that entire gatorade bottle) wore off and I hit the wall completely.

With an hour still to go...I walked the last 5 miles home alone...vowing never to do that again.

I shared 5 key points in my talk...
1. Have a goal. For me, to be inspired, I've got to aspire towards something.
2. Know why you're running. (I shared the story of running 100km, raising $ for the women in Africa. It was a good story. It's hard to believe we ran 100km all in one day. We're just planning our 6th annual Great Big Run For Africa right now...and in the past 5 years, we've raised over $100,000...not bad for 4 girls-a couple meetings/year-each taking turns on what's become a relay run-and laughing in the RV all day!
3. Pay attention to the stories in you're head. I shared the example of how, for my entire life, I've thought I was not a good runner, even though I've done lots of running...and how one person can make such a positive influence when they help you change the story in your head... When Eric told me I was a good runner (He had to state specific examples of my running...and I still didn't really believe it...) but during the race, I told myself "I'm a good runner!" over and over and over...and...apparently...telling myself this new story seemed to make it come true.
4. Join a group. This one was self-explanitory...Simply put - we're better together. And we can go farther (in life and on a run) when surrounded by friends.
5. Find someone that believes in you. I ended with my story of Pete and how he did his best to teach me how to swim (in 3 weeks) for my first triathlon...and I went from there, barely finishing, to the Ironman within a year.

I think I've done about 30 of these speeches, on various topics, for the Running Room. I feel very blessed to meet such amazing people; some learing to run; some elite runners; some somewhere in between...but all totally inspiring b/c they are out there running even though there's a million things that they probably need to do before the day is done. I find the "learn to run" clinic the most inspiring b/c, for these people, running is a far-off dream and they found the courage to somehow show up and give it a try!

Very cool!

And I also took some time for me. Took some time to putter around the house. Took some time to garden for a couple hours. Took some time to play with Scotia. Took some time to look at holiday destinations. Took some time to read. And Relax. Laugh with friends. Listen to Gwen in one of her fabulous performing moments. And talk with friends about ideas, dreams, my career and holiday plans!!!

I think I'm getting my career/calling sorted out! Yes - miracles do happen! Thank GOD!

I went running - ran 2 hours a couple days ago! Felt fabulous! Then, today, I went and did exercises and stretching on the dock. It was gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous!

I feel so blessed!

It feels good to give a little...and take a little.

Love you, Mom.
Can't wait to see you!
Did the Rider's win?
love Crystal

Christmas is coming!!!!!

2010-09-24T22:31:00.000-07:00

Christmas is just around the corner!!!
Here's a look at a few photos from years gone by.
I can hardly wait for this year's Christmas fun! Flights are booked!
can't wait to see you and Don!!!
You're amazing, Mom!
Love you,
Crystal
PS: Where on earth did you get this bunch?

Anticipation.

2010-09-23T19:49:00.001-07:00

The anticipation of something is almost as good as the thing itself sometimes...

Like when you plan a holiday. I like to plan far in advance so that I can daydream, plan, think about and get excited about the holiday! It's sort of a let-down for me if a holiday is planned on the spur of the moment b/c then I don't get to plan or create/feel the anticipation over everything. And God knows I like to get excited about most anything.

I like to get my suitcase out. Start making a little pile of things to take. Research places to go and things to see. And relish in the thought of going on a holiday...even if it's months away.

I like the anticipation experienced with planning a holiday, going out for dinner or having friends over. Not that I don't love a surprise b/c I do...but then I get to make an "experience" out of it and do/add the little extra things I like to create.

Like you coming out to visit!!! Yay!!!!!!!! Or coming home early for Christmas! Thx for calling tonight Mom. I am booking my flight for Monday or Tuesday before xmas until the 26th. I'm looking forward to being your helper and the cutting/chopping queen! I'll talk to Gwen and we'll book flights asap!!

Here's a photo of Gwen's house decorated for their anniversary. I'm not sure if they had much time to anticipate and celebrate before their anniversary but I think they had a great evening out. You can't tell, but the tiki posters on the garage are actually quite big!

Right now I'm planning a few things that will give lots of opportunity for anticipation....a surfing holiday, some new work plans that are in the works and another ironman race next year (you didn't think that could possibly have been the last, I hope.) :)

Love you, Mom.
Thanks for your call!
It's so nice to talk with you!
You're really make everyone's day with just a few minutes with you.
See you soon,
Love Crystal

Real life can be so funny....

2010-09-23T08:59:00.000-07:00

911 Phone Call that a 4 year old boy made...

Operator: 911 emergencies
Boy: Yeah, I need some help.
Operator: What’s the matter?
Boy: With my math.
Operator: With your mouth?
Boy: No with my math. I have to do it. Will you help me?
Operator: Sure. Where do you live?
Boy: No with my math.
Operator: Yeah, I know it. Where do you live though?
Boy: No, I want you to talk to me over the phone.
Operator: No, I can’t do that. I can send someone to help you.
Boy: Okay, um.
Operator: What kind of math do you have that you need help with?
Boy: I have take aways.
Operator: Oh you have to do the take aways.
Boy: Yeah
Operator: Alright, what’s the problem?
Boy: Um, you have to help me with my math.
Operator: Okay. Tell me what the math is.
Boy: Okay. 16 take away 8 is what?
Operator: You tell me. How much do you think it is?
Boy: I don’t know. 1?
Operator: No. How old are you?
Boy: I’m only 4.
Operator: 4!
Boy: Yeah.
Operator: Yeah. What’s another problem? That was a tough one.
Boy: Um, Oh here’s one. 5 take away 5?
Operator: 5 take away 5 and how much do you think that is?
Boy:5!
Woman: Johnny what do you think you are doing?!
Boy: The policeman is helping me with my math.
Woman: What did I tell you about going on the phone?
Operator: It’s the mother...
Boy: You said if I need help to call somebody.
Woman: I didn’t mean the police!

http://www.wimp.com/kidmath/

Oh My GOD...this is so funny, I can hardly stop from laughing. I've listened to this so many times, I think I can recite it entirely. It's hilarious! (Well...maybe not for the mother...but for the rest of the world, it's priceless!)

Real life can be so funny! And having the ability to laugh at real life, especially when things aren't sooooo funny, would be a real gift and a great way to maneuver through any situation.

Mom, I bet you could write a book on all the funny stories of your kids and grand-kids....
HEY...that's a great idea!!!!!!!!!!

Lets talk about it when you get here! I can't wait for you and Don to arrive!!!
Love you!!!!
Crystal

It's never too late...

2010-09-22T08:32:00.000-07:00

It's never too late in the year to have a backyard party! All you need to do is string up some lights, get some blankets and build a little fire.

And add a little wine or Bailey's and hot chocolate and good friends.

It's also never too late to learn to play the guitar...or dance...or go back to school...or try something new.

It's never too late to say "I'm sorry" or try again for most things.

It's really never too late to change careers or create a new one.

It's never to late for anything!

It's never too late to get married...(Thanks Mom!) (And...um...no...don't get any ideas!)

And it's definitely never too late to celebrate a gorgeous day, like today, where there's not a cloud in the sky! The sunrise was absolutely stunning!

I'm sure it's never too late in the fall for one more trip to the beach.

Thank God it's also never too late to fix an old fridge! It gets fixed today! Hard to believe it's made in 2001. It looks almost new.

Mom, thanks for teaching me that it's never too late to try!
I love you!
Crystal
PS I miss you! When are you guys coming out!! I've got the suite ready for you and Don!!
PPS It's really never too late to make the bus in highschool with you watching out the kitchen window....or the garbage truck...if you run really fast and roll your garbage bin to the next block where the truck hasn't been yet!

Just start on SOMETHING!

2010-09-20T07:35:00.000-07:00

"That's enough!"
Yes...that is just about enough! (I can hear you saying this Mom, in exactly your tone.)

No more missing my daily post to you, Mom. No more running around in circles. No more spinning my wheels stuck in one place.

While trying to be intentional and be in the present moment, I've got to just start on something!

I seem to be stuck in some sort of holding pattern right now. I think it's caused by my indecision and lack of clarity around my work and the direction I want to take in my career. I know I'm on the verge of something AMAZING but I'm not exactly sure what that is.

I've worked hard this past year and for several years. And there's been much of that time that I knew I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing...and now it feels like I've sort of outgrown where I've been but I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to be growing into.

Secretly, I think all the work in the jungle was somehow divinely created to give me reason to slow down and be in one place, focusing on something physical that needed my attention so that I didn't have to really think. (And I thank God that it doesn't seem to end...although this is the last of the jungle offerings for this year. I picked the last peaches a few days ago and the rhubarb too. :(

I know I'm exactly where I am supposed to be...in this house...surrounded by family and friends that I love and who love me...and creating space to allow the future to unfold.

But it's FRUSTRATING! It would be easy if I was content teaching my business programs...or facilitating workshops or...or...or...AND WHILE I LOVE ALL OF THOSE THINGS...I feel that I'm being called somewhere else...to something of much greater impact on a much larger scale (not that I'm to be moving/travelling so much...b/c I don't think that's the case...but I do feel that my level of influence or what ever it is that I'm to be doing next will have a far-reaching impact to/for others.

It's very exciting. But I am frustrated. Unsure. Sort of lost. Wishing someone would tell me what to do.

Yet...I know the answer will come from within and I just have to wait and be open to it and trust that even if I don't know where I'm going, there's a higher calling that is guiding me. And I do believe that.....I just wish I knew where we were going!

For now, I realize that I have to tie up a few loose ends. Start on SOMETHING! And remain open to the gorgeous sunrise tomorrow!

This was the sunrise this morning and it was a glorious moment...one that made me stand there in awe, mesmerized.

And even if it's cloudy tomorrow (the forecast is for rain), it can still be sunny in my world...if I just get started on something and not let myself get too frustrated by this process of growth.

Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.

At least I'm grateful that I'm growing a little...and not going through a stagnant change.

Mom, I love you. That's enough. No more spinning my wheels. I've got lots to get to before you get here. Most of which are activities that I think God has designed for me to experience "being" in while doing them.

Love you.
See you soon.
Crystal

2010-09-19T11:54:00.000-07:00

Mom,
I heard a great line today when watching an educational video. It said;

"If children have interest, education happens."

It's not only true of children but adults, too.

The video also mentioned "the method of the grandmother", which was to have a person stand behind students and admire them and say "Great job. You're doing really well." (This is what you do for all your grandkids and kids! Thank you, by the way.)

So, anyway, the video talked about learning and how people (not just children) learn when they're interested in something and are self-directed (meaning they go and research the answer). It was very COOL!

It made me think of what I could be doing with my future...how I could make a difference somehow in my own way...and while I don't know exactly what my calling is, it's never too late to keep trying.

After all, Sister Madonna is almost 80 and doing Ironman races. You and Don got married at 70! (I loved when you said "There's still hope for you, honey. Look at me!" (in reference to getting married at 70) :) I know a lady who went to university at 65 and became a counsellor at 69.

You're right, Mom, there's lots of hope and time for all great things to happen...
This past year has been one extraordinary year...and the one coming will be even better.

I just saw a commercial that said, "Are you reaching your potential? Your calling is calling." (That's a bit ironic and sit here writing you and thinking about my calling. WEIRD!!

Anyway, I'm rambling...but I did do my 3 little things towards my goal yesterday and today, I'm gonna get there, too! Yay! Small steps. As Cindy says, "keep moving forward". Yesterday, I went out for a long run and found myself in the pouring rain, scrambling up a dirt embankment (looking for a shortcut), laughing to myself. It was a great adventure! Sort of like life.

Today, I had a few stumbling blocks though...the freezer (with all the frozen cherries and peaches in it) died today. I think it's the whole freezer and fridge, actually, but for now, I just care about the freezer's contents. I took as much as I could to the downstairs fridge and then went out to buy a little freezer. It's plugged in and cooling now...so I think your fruit will be OK. At least I hope so. I'll check into a new fridge tomorrow.

I love you, Mom.
Thank you for sharing the true essence of the method of the grandmother to all of us!
Crystal

"Doing" vs "Being"

2010-09-15T09:04:00.000-07:00

The past few days, I was busy "doing"....but not "being".

Doing a lot of things...work for a few clients, a workshop for a local business, lots of stuff for the hostel, spending time in he backyard jungle, hosting a party with some friends, more errands for the hostel, etc.

But something was missing.

I wasn't "being" in the moment. I was just doing all of these things. Like checking things off a checklist. (Not very intentional, I know.) Somewhere in the last couple days, I forgot to just "be".

I have not been entirely cranky the past few days...but I've been a bit off the last day or so. For sure, yesterday, I was irritable b/c my neck's been sore, giving me headaches. Poor Poopy pants me! (It would be a good name for me right now. Not literally - but figuratively.)

Inside voice: Thank GOD I'm not injured or sick very often. I don't think I'd handle it very well. I'm so used to functioning at 90-100%. I admire and respect anyone who deals with being sick, disabled or injured SO MUCH!

So...I'm thinking...was I off yesterday b/c of my neck or what?
....am I needing something? Missing something? Hhhhmmmmm? I'm not sure, but it'll be something to think about.

I think what it really is...is that just forgot something...how good things really are!‎"Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are." Marianne Williamson

In my workshop the other day, the group was amazing. One of the rare businesses and teams that have it right! They work so well together, honestly like eachother, have very low staff turnover and seem very motivated from the inside out! It was amazing to be a part of their group for a day.

In the workshop, I gave them each a copy of my "90 Day Challenge" and invited them to participate in a challenge for the next 90 days....
1. Pick 2 goals (large or small, work or personal in nature)
2. Every day - do 3 tiny little things towards achieving those goals

If we did that, that would be 3 little things per day x 3 months = 270 little tiny steps towards our goals and dreams! (And if we forget or don't get these things done, that's OK too...just move on to the next day with no hard feelings or guilt!)

So...I decided to take the challenge too!

My two goals are:
1. learn to play the guitar = at least 5 songs
2. focus on my fitness and health

It's going to be a fun 90 days...

Mom, I think I might have let my mouth get away on me...b/c I told the group that I'd come in and play the guitar for them at the end of the 90 days!

Uh Oh!

It's time to start being....AND doing! I'm totally excited b/c I said one of my goals out loud and said I would commit to something....I gave my word. There's no going back now!

Mom, I'm sorry I have not written much lately. It was a busy week. And I think I lost sight of myself the past few days, just busy doing and not being. (and not living intentionally). I'm sorry!

Simply taking time to write, think about you, slow down and just be feels like a bridge to living more intentionally.

Thank you, Mom.
Love you,
Crystal

PS

2010-09-14T11:03:00.000-07:00

PS: Practising what I preach feels pretty good. A 40 minute run on the trail this mornning really does make for a great start to the day...and now...I really must get to work!

What are you called to do?

2010-09-14T08:37:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about this question for years. I ask myself this question often. I ask this question in all my programs and workshops. I encourage and push people to dig deep and figure out what they are called to do.

I know and feel that I'm on the right track, moving in the direction of what I am called to do...but I'm not there yet. Sometimes I feel like I am moving forward...sometimes...moving 2 steps backwards.

Sometimes I have felt that I'm doing exactly what I am called to do. And then a year later, I'm not satisfied with whatever that was anymore...and am craving a bit of a change or something different in my career. Perhaps that's just evolution or growth. Who would want to do the exact same thing for years on end without growing, changing or evolving...so I think it's great that I'm always wanting to get better and figure out where my spirit is being called.

I just know there is more out there for me in my career. I know I am not at my potential yet. (Thank God! Wouldn't it be sad to know that the best days of my career have already passed...and I'm not even 40!) I know that I've got more to give, more to share and more inspiring to do.

And to do that, I've just got to be present, listen to my intuition and use my head but follow my heart.

This year, I am grateful as I reflect on all these changes; all the simplifying in my life; all the slowing down and being still; all the 'getting real and honest with myself'; all the de-cluttering in my surroundings and in my soul; all the work; all the changes (the new house, slowing down and refocusing on my priorities, re-evaluation of my entire life to live more intentionally) are paying off, I think.

I feel so much more joyful and joy-filled, more inspired, more at peace and more calm and relaxed.

And yet again, I just need to focus now...focus on a just a few things at a time, not everything all at once, and show up every day to follow through on those few things.

I used to have a saying that I would tell my clients/participants in my groups;

"Become more than you were when you woke up this morning."

If we just show up and become a little more, every day, then...at the end of the month, year or decade...those tiny little steps taken every day to become just a tiny bit more...will have an exponential effect on our lives.

What this really says to me is to simply practise what I preach. Follow my own advice. Maybe even do my own "90 Day Challenge" workbook that I created. (Now, that's a novel idea!)

Mom, you always practise what you preach. It's probably time I did, too.

Thank you.
Love you,
Crystal

Just as I am.

2010-09-13T11:53:00.000-07:00

The weather yesterday was a bit dreary. Sort of rainy. Cloudy. And cool.

A perfect day to make dinner and flapper pie for some friends.

You know when you want something to turn out "just right" and you plan, prepare and think it'll all go according to plan...but then, for some strange reason...it doesn't?

That's what happened.

And the moment the milk (for the flapper pie) started boiling over the pot all over the stove, I just knew it was going to be one of those moments that just don't go according to plan.

I think I uttered a few profanities (well...lets be honest...I know I did!) and trying to salvage the situation when flustered and nervous can only lead to bad things!

Bad = runny pies that don't quite set properly.

They still tasted good, mind you, but something went wrong...I'm not sure if I didn't boil the milk enough b/c I was nervous that it would burn, or if the oven wasn't hot enough....

Hhhhhmmmmmm......

Whatever the reason, things did not go according to my expectations or plan.

The funny thing, though, is that no one seemed to mind. They just laughed and after dinner, ate the pies like they were perfect...just as they were.

It made me think of myself.

We are all 'just the way we are' in many ways.

I realized, as I ate my runny piece of pie with a spoon lastnight, life is quite extraordinary if I simply surround myself with people who love me, just as I am...and who don't mind what my pie looks like...

Mom, this is just another little lesson that you taught us. To just be ourselves. Not to try too hard or apologize for what we are (or aren't) in life or be upset when things don't work out as planned. We just are who we are. And if we can just be that, it'll all work out!

Love you.
Crystal

Little road-blocks

2010-09-11T20:34:00.000-07:00

This is a photo of driving in India last year...when it wasn't the rainy season. I can only imagine what the roads are like now, with all the flooding the area is experiencing.

The are having serious road blocks over there. In lots of areas, the roads are no longer even there and if they are, they are under water.

It makes the little roadblocks in my life seem so minor. Frivolous. Almost non-existent.

In other parts of the world, there are no solutions that will quickly fix the problems people are facing. For the road blocks in my life, there are easy solutions...

Focus. Discipline. Fun.

I need to focus on the things I want more of in my life. It is time to be disciplined. Talk is cheap! At the same time, things need to be fun if I'm going to follow through and remain focused and disciplined in certain areas!

I often wonder "Where does the time go?"

I have no idea....it just goes.

But if I can be a little more focused and disciplined...who knows what I could actually achieve! I'm still so grateful (and slightly in awe) of the Ironman race and how well I did, considering my lack of training. (Mom, you must have been praying a LOT!) It's not really anything to be too proud of (doing OK in spite of myself)! Imagine what I could accomplish if I actually trained and had a bit of focus and discipline!!

And really...how long do I have to listen to the voice in my head talk about playing the guitar, that 6-pack I want to have once in my life or writing my book?

(Better question...How long do you have to read about it?)

It's time...to move the roadblocks, to stop talking and start doing!

So...realizing that I'm not really being too good on my own, I'm joining up with your #10...Gwen and I are on a fitness kick! well, she's always on a fitness kick... We're going to check in with one another, work out, work hard and make it happen! This will help take care of one of my aspirations.

As for the guitar and my various projects...

It's time.

Little steps every day! Time's ticking and waits for no one...so I better start walking in the direction of where I want to go...instead of simply admiring the view!

Do I really want to just sit and admire the view or actually get where I want to go!?

Really - I don't know you to sit and admire the view too long....you're too busy with your head down, walking.

Thx for the little kick in the butt that writing this has given me.
Love you, Mom. Hi to Don!
Your #8.
PS GO RIDERS in the game tomorrow!!

2010-09-11T08:36:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
I love you!!

There's a great country song called, "Today I'm gonna try and change the world" that describes how you change the world every day.
It's a good day to do just that...change the world...or at least, try make it a little better with my presence.
I love you!
Say hi to Don! Tell him that Gwen and I were sending him some good vibes lastnight as we hung out together.
love Crystal
PS More later today...I'm going for a run this morning while the sun is shining!
PPS Here's the lyrics to the song...it reminds me so much of you.

TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD
GONNA TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME
I'VE MADE MY RESOLUTION
I'VE OPENED UP MY EYES
TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD

I'M GONNA SAY HELLO TO MY NEIGHBOR
GREET HIM WITH A SMILE
SHAKE THE HAND OF A STRANGER
SIT AND TALK FOR A WHILE
TELL SOMEONE I LOVE THEM
FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART
TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD

(REPEAT CHORUS)

GONNA MAKE SURE MY CHILDREN
KNOW THERES A RIGHT AND WRONG
I'LL NEVER TURN MY BACK
ON THOSE OF US WHO NEED SOMEONE
I'M GONNA TRY TO SEE MYSELF
THROUGH ANOTHERS EYES
TODAY IM GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD

(REPEAT CHORUS)

TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD
TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD
NOT FOR ME, BUT FOR THOSE I'LL LEAVE BEHIND
I'VE MADE MY RESOLUTION
CHANGE IT ONE DAY AT TIME
TODAY I'M GONNA TRY AND CHANGE THE WORLD

(by Johnny Reid)

3 steps to happiness...

2010-09-10T10:52:00.000-07:00

I got this print several weeks ago and when Kate and Garth were here, they put it up in the dining room. It's perfect!

Reading a magazine the other day, called "Ode", I came across an article that talked about fulfillment and happiness. It mentioned 3 little steps that I believe in...and that you live, Mom.

3 steps to happiness and fulfillment
1. Know yourself
2. Be yourself
3. Give yourself away.

How simple is that...and so true.

I still have so much to learn, like we all do, about knowing ourselves...and I think that's a process called "life". But I love the part about being yourself. In the article, written by a priest, it mentions a note the author got from a retired bishop that said, "Many will say 'be Christ-like for the sake of others'. I say to you, 'be yourself for Christ's sake."

(...and if you can imagine the Bishop sayng the "for Christ's sake!" part with a bit of expression and pizzazz...and maybe a little sarcasm...it's quite funny, don't you think?!)

Love that! I thought you'd like it too, Mom!

And the last part is so perfect and what I really have believed all my life...to discover my gifts and share them with the world...inspiring others to do the same.

Mom, I see your your wisdom shine through everywhere, whether it's the pages of a magazine or book or something you've said or done over the years.

You have so much common sense, simple wisdom that really does lead to happiness and fulfillment just by thinking of you and trying to live a little more along those lines.

I went through every single piece of clothing I own the other day and that, in itself, has made me feel so much better! Thank you!! Now I just have to get to the garage and hang a few more pictures and decide on paint colours for the house! Hopefully by the time you get here, much of the work will be done!! I'm holding out on the kitchen cupboards waiting for you though!!

Love you,
Crystal

We only live once...

2010-09-09T07:02:00.000-07:00

If I knew that I only lived once...and will never get another chance to live this lifetime, this year, this week, this day or this minute again...what would I choose to do differently (or the same)?

I'd try to live as much as possible like you live, Mom.

For sure, I'd take more risks (because...as I heard it said best, "the only real risk is in risking nothing"). I'd not worry too much or at all. I'd not get too stressed about anything. I'd forget about trying and just focus on being. I'd speak only of joy, happiness and positive ideas and things. I'd focus only on what I can control. I'd smile all day long and share all the joy, hope and love inside of me. I'd be completely focused on my mission in life - to lead by example, encouraging others to discover their innate gifts and talents and share them with the world. I'd laugh as much as possible. I'd celebrate life.

I'd give every minute everything I've got.

This is why I love doing Ironman triathlons. It's in those moments, during the race, that I live like this...risking all that I am, not worrying too much about the wind or weather or things beyond my control. I just focus on the present moment and being the best that I can. I smile as much as possible and make new friends, encouraging others to discover the strength inside that they never knew they had. And it's definitely out on the course that I celebrate constantly...getting through the swim, getting out on the bike and passing different land-marks, finishing the bike, and then celebrating every mile as it passes to get to the finish line. This is where I discover my best self and give every minute everything that I've got.

I have so much to learn about living this way every day...but this realization is a great start. So simple...yet so hard at times to do.

For now, I hope to run every day, even if it's for only 45 minutes, to remind me that we only live once....and to give every moment everything I've got!

Thank you, Mom, for continuing to be my inspiration...in my race last week and every day!

Here are some photos of the race...

As you can see, it was a day of big smiles and lots of joy!
Love you,
Crystal

This is the world's largest mass swim start with over 3000 competitors!

My moment to shine...going up Richter Pass!

I never knew it...but I'm actually a good runner!

I finished...with my third best race time...feeling fabulous!

And so very grateful for you, Mom, and for my family and friends who are always the wind beneath my wings!

I love you Mom! Thank you for your prayers!!!

We're all meant to shine!

2010-09-08T08:00:00.000-07:00

I had a bright idea the other day....to go out night-trail-running!

It was a good idea at the time...

But, lastnight, as it was raining, with the sun down and as we made our way out to East Kelowna and got out of the vehicle with our headlamps on...it didn't quite seem as good of an idea. It was pretty dark and the shadows of the trees...and the fact that we were running out into "nowhere" was a bit scary.

It wasn't quite dark though, so we ran for about 20 minutes on an uphill trail...until we decided that it was probably far enough. I clapped the whole way, thinking that would scare any animals away.

By the time we turned around, we needed our headlamps and it was dark! As we made our way back down to the starting point, the lights of Kelowna were so beautiful. The rain stopped. The night air was warm. It was a glorious night. A night that we would never have enjoyed if we hadn't given it a try....

It was also a fun new experience!

Lots of people run in the trails at night around Kelowna. There are adventure races that go through the night. But for a first time out, this was a pretty bold adventure....all 40 minutes! :) When we were almost back to the base of the trail, 2 runners came from another trail that joined ours. They had no headlamps. They came from the abyss of darkness. They didn't look at all afraid. I was (more than) slightly in awe of their courage and ability to see in the dark!

Getting back to the car, I was glad we attempted something new, went out on a mini-adventure and faced being afraid of the dark, out there in the middle of nowhere....

It wasn't really "nowhere". I had my cell phone and there was cell service...so really, it was just slightly off the paved road and up and around the bend.

Regardless, it was a new experience and I think, without trying new experiences, being brave and finding the courage to get out of my comfort zone, how would we discover where we shine?

I think we're all meant to shine - in a big way! Growing up, Mom, you always let us try whatever we wanted, without controlling us or forcing us (except for those organ lessons!!!) (Which I am very grateful for now, by the way!) We were given lots of opportunities to discover where we could shine...and where we didn't.

I know that baseball is not where I shine. I can barely hit the ball. I know that being ultra-organized is also not where I shine. And I know that my attention to detail is not the strongest....

But I can see the big picture in most cases, very easily. I can take on most any challenge and think "I can do that!" and I love to work hard, dig deep and see what I am capable of - in most any area. These are places I shine.

It's amazing to look at all of us...your kids and grandkids...and see how different we are...and how uniquely we shine...even though we grew up the same way with your same influence.

I can hardly wait for the next few years...to see how a little more focus, a little more discipline, a little less distraction can enable me to shine brighter.

I see that "the answer is yes" and it's time to shine in new areas of interest - playing the guitar, getting a grip on this jungle, developing new (and existing) business ideas and creating new products...I'm so excited about that!

So...if the answer is "yes" to these new things....what must I say "no" to, in order to create space to shine in these areas?

If I truly want these new things, I have to say no to other things...or somehow create space to shine in new areas...

To start, I am thinking of where I spend my energy and time...and the biggest thing that I see is that I could be so much more organized. I waste so much time being disorganized....from the clothes in my closet to the garage that has yet be unpacked....
These are 2 places to start!

It's time...
Love you, Mom. Thank you for helping me shine...and for the courage to try something new...and to then turn around when I think it's time!
Love Crystal

Creating space...

2010-09-06T22:28:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally got my running shoes on, for the first time since the race, and went for a run through the park in Caseloma. Not too long, just over 40 minutes, and after a week of doing absolutely nothing, it felt so good to get out and get some exercise. I can't believe my body is feeling 100% already! I am blessed!!

The weather was cloudy and calm, making the sky and water almost the exact same shade of blue-gray. It was gorgeous.

Getting back to the simple things today felt good. Creating space to go for a run. Then, making time to pic those weeds in the front garden that I've had on my "to do" list for a month, a couple of which were taller than me! Oops...

I'm a bit quiet today. Not that anything's wrong. Probably just that the rush and excitement of the race is over and it's the calm, quiet time that comes after accomplishing or completing anything, creating space for the future and new opportunities.

I'm so grateful for my health and that the race went so well. So happy to share the experience with people I care so much about. So excited about the possibility of actually applying myself and seeing what I'm capable of next time.

(I know Mom...you are waiting for the day that I'm done with this racing stuff...but if Sister Madonna is doing Ironman races at 80, I must have a few years left.) :)

Lastnight, I made an amazing cherry, peach, blueberry crumble, with peaches and cherries from the backyard. I had to do something with the peaches b/c they are filling up the fridge and I needed to create space there. And I'd make fruit crumble every day if I could!!

Create space...and then fill it.

I think this is what we do in ln so many areas of our lives....

In the garden, b/c it's where there's no plants that the weeds grow.

I create space in terms of my time...and then fill it.

In the fridge, too.

And in my cupboards and closets.

Mostly, though I see how I do this....in my mind.

I create space in my mind...and then I fill that space with a new (or old) thought, idea or feeling.

I'm going to try to just create space in my mind...and leave it empty for a bit. Stop using my ipod when I run once in while. Get out and pick more of those weeds and get lost (in the jungle and in my mind), thinking about nothing.

As I write this, Mom, I'm thinking about the back closet at your house, where there's a perfect mix of creating space and then filling it....with recycling, tupperware, potatoes, jars, containers and even the roaster.

I love you. Miss you.
Can't wait to see you.
love Crystal
PS: I need to create space in my closet, garage and organize the kitchen cupboards in a better way! How about if I do the closet and garage...and save the kitchen cupboards to do with you, when you get here? :)

Attravrsiamo

2010-09-06T09:13:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
We went to the movie "Eat Pray Love" lastnight. It was soooo good! It's about a girl who decides to travel the world for one year - finding herself. First she goes to Italy to indulge in food and wine and learn Italian. Then she goes to India to pray. And lastly, she goes to Indonesia (Balli) to find the balance of the two.

It was awesome! I read the book a few years ago and the movie was almost as good as the book!

One part of the movie that I really liked was an Italian word, "attraversiamo" which means "to cross over". It made me think of all the times in my life where there was a bridge to cross or a leap (of faith) to make...and how, every day, we have to take that leap of faith to move in the direction we want to go...

There are so many great quotes from the movie - many of which I can see you saying.
I think you would like the movie. We'll have to get it when it comes out on video.

Love you,
Crystal
PS Just in case you're getting any ideas, I'm not planning on travelling the world, Mom. But I am excited and getting ready for your visit to come here!!!

EAT PRAY LOVE - quotes

You want to get to the castle, you gotta swim the moat.

God dwells within you, as you.

To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced life.

I once recognised myself as a friend

You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughtta be.

Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark.

It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.

As smoking is to the lungs, so it resentment to the soul...even one puff is bad for you.

My Guru says that people universally tend to think that happiness is a stroke of luck, something that will maybe descend upon you like fine weather if you're fortunate enough. But that's not how happiness works. Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it.

That's just your ego, trying to make sure it stays in charge. This is what your ego does. It keeps you feeling separate, keeps you with a sense of duality, tries to convince you that you're flowed and broken and alone instead of whole."
"But how does that serve me?"
"It doesn't serve you. Your ego's job isn't to serve you. Its only job is to keep itself in power. And right now, your ego's scared to death cuz it's about to get downsized. You keep up this spiritual path, baby, and that bad boy's days are numbered. Pretty soon your ego will be out of work, and your heart'll be making all the decisions. So your ego's fighting for its life, playing with your mind, trying to assert its authority, trying to keep you concerned off in a holding pen away from the rest of the universe. Don't listen to it."

You were given life; it's your duty (and also your entitlement as a human being) to find something beautiful within life, no matter how slight.

Clear out the spaces in your mind.

"There are only 2 things that people really fight about in life:
1. How much do you love me?, and
2. Who is in charge?"

The hub of calmness- that's your heart. That's were God lives within you. So stop looking for answers in the world. Just keep coming back to that center and you will always find peace.

You are, after all, what you think. Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.

You have to learn to select your thoughts the same way you select your clothes every day..now that's a power you can cultivate.

Your treasure, your perfection is within you already. But to claim it, you must leave the busy commotion of the mind and abandon the desires of the ego and enter into silence oft the heart.

To find the balance you want you must keep your feet grounded so firmly on the earth that its like you have 4 legs instead of 2. That way you stay in the world but you must stop looking at the world through your head you must look through your heart instead.That way you will know god.

Send him some love and light every time you think about him, and then drop it.

When you sense a faint potentiality for happiness after such dark times you must grab onto the ankles of that happiness and not let go until it drags you face-first out of the dirt... this is not selfishness, but obligation.

Ruin and failure is the road to transformation.

We are more than we think we could be...

2010-09-04T09:41:00.000-07:00

Thank God for the people in my life who challenge me to believe that I'm more than I thought I could be.

Yesterday, I thanked God for the people in my life who challenge me to believe that I'm more than I thought I could be.

At the ironman race, I met someone I've admired for years. Her name is Sister Madonna. She's a nun. She's also 80. And she's done 44 Ironman races!

Yes - FORTY-FOUR!!!!!

Her brother, who actually was a "brother" also did them until he past away in his mid-eighties, a few years ago.

Sister Madonna is an inspiration to everyone in the triathlon sport. She's humble. Confident. Strong. Determined. And so much more. She didn't finish the race last week. She had trouble with her wetsuit and couldn't finish the swim. When she was telling us about it, she said,

"The Lord saved me from that awful weather on the bike. So, when I pulled myself out of the swim, I went to warm up in the med-tent and decided to volunteer there for the rest of the day."

I think God uses us for bigger things sometimes. Bigger things than we might think we're capable of.

I know that when I have faith and am open to possibilities that God, the Universe and life present to me, my life is on it's "right" path. I'm on my right path. And it's such a different path from the safe, controlled, limiting path that I might have opted for....

Today, I thank God for having a bigger use for me than what I might think I'm capable of.

My sister Gwen shows me, every day, how her life is used by God to make a difference in the world. (The day before the race, she gave me some pictures of her - to take on the race. I took those pictures and when I ran into the headwinds on the bike, I pulled them out of my little bike bag and looked at them. They gave me strength - to dig deep - to be strong - and to have faith.

Lastnight, we went to a concert by Jesse Cook at Mission Hill Winery.

It was gorgeous!!! Oh My GOD! It was a stunning evening!

Jesse Cook is one of the most amazing guitar players ever! He and his band put on a show that brought people to their feet most of the night. He was amazing! I think, in some way, there's a spiritual aspect to anyone who is soooo good at what they do. I think they are called there - to that place - to follow their path...to become what they could be.

I think we're all called to become what we could be. I think we're all called to be AMAZING at something in our lifetime!!!

...if only we'd listen to that calling.

As I write this, I am thinking about my own life - my own calling - wondering what I am called to do. I am wndering about the next phase of my life...wondering what I should be focusing on, spending my time on... to be "used" by God in my life. I'm wondering what's in me...gifts I am born with, that are wanting to get out...wondering what I am called to be, to do...to shine, to share, to inspire...

While I don't know some of these answers, I do know that living a little more intentionally, living a little more slowly, living a lot more from my heart and a lot less from my mind is a giant leap to becoming what I could be and a great step closer to being used by God for bigger things!

Love you, Mom.
Crystal

There is power in your words.

2010-09-03T10:12:00.000-07:00

From the start line to the finish line...and a full house to an empty one....

Oh my God, Mom...it's been a big week of celebration! There hasn't been a moment to even stop and rest the past week! I'm sorry I have not written much this week. It's been non-stop laughing, fun, visiting and celebrating with family and friends since the race. The house has been filled with family, food, festivities (wine) and laughter. The only thing missing is you and Don.

Kate and Garth left today after a wonderful time spent here. I think they really had a great time. Gwen and Rob have been over every night this week for dinner, too, and all of us have had such a good time together!

There really is nothing like family! We are all so very blessed.

I don't know where to start...
The race seems like forever ago, but I wanted to tell you about it and then I'll get to your famous flapper pie that Kate and I made (which turned out superb...thx to your recipe and instruction)! You would have been proud! I am my mother's daughter!

It's so funny...Mom, you shine through each of us in different ways. Your sense of taking care of everything and covering all the details is totally evident in Kate. She calmly takes care of everything, like you do. And then your sense of humour is definitely present in Gwen. She is hilarious. Lastnight, and, well, most nights, she is in fine form! I'm not sure what part of you comes through me, but I'm sure there are so many parts of you in all of us...how lucky for us.

So...the race!

Mom, it was truly one of my best races. For many different reasons...

Thankfully, I was pretty organized and had all my stuff laid out and ready to go.

It was very windy the days before the race. I was quite nervous, obviously. The weather was not cooperating. The day before the race, when we were checking our bikes in and giving our transition bags (with bike gear in one bag and running gear in another), it was still windy!

While we were there, I thought I should get down on my knees and pray a little! ;)

I know....I was sort of kidding around....but there's "truth in humour"!
I did pray a lot before the race. During the race. And after.

There were over 3000 people in the race! This made it the world's largest mass swim start ever! I'll have race photos for you (from the photographers) in a few days, to show you how incredible it really was.

On race morning, the water was like glass. It was perfectly calm. Sunrise was still an hour away as we got down to the transition area to get ready for the race. But by the time the canon went off to start the race at 7am, it was quite light out.

I had a great start to the swim. It felt easy. I wasn't stressed at all. And while I tried to find people to swim behind, and draft, I mostly stuck to myself, simply moving forward, closer to the turn-around and tried to sing songs in my head. Before I knew it, I was on my way back to the shore. At one point, I found myself sort of daydreaming, like when I go out for a training swim, so I had to get back near the other swimmers b/c they motivate me to focus and get my head in the race. Getting back to shore was awesome and although I spent 10 minutes in transition, getting changed and ready to get on the bike (not sure what exactly I was doing for that long), I eventually got on the bike and cheered and waved to everyone as I sped through town. It was wonderful to see people that I knew and wave, smile and enjoy the time. Someday, I should be more competitive and focus on the race, but this day was not one of those days. I was a bit nervous about the race still, due to my minimal training, so I just wanted to take it easy and have fun.

The bike ride started out FAST! For 2 hours,to the base of Richter Pass, I was in my zone, singing songs in my head and feeling like a machine! I should mention the awesome tailwind that pushed me forward through the first 50km. It was awesome!

Then, at the base of Richter pass, I stopped for a moment to rest. On training rides, I always stopped here so that's what I did in the race. Just for a couple minutes. To relax. To breathe.

A rider from Mexico (they were all in orange jerseys) asked if I was OK as he passed by. I said yes and thought to myself, "gee. That was nice of him."

Then I got on my bike and started my favourite part of the bike course. The 12km climb up Richter Pass. Smiling pretty much the whole way, I started catching up and then passing people. Not that I'm a better rider, just that I know the course so well and have been up and down this hill probably 30 times over the years. And I'm a pretty good climber with these muscular legs of mine.

Some days I wish for long skinny legs...but not this day. I'll take my legs any day on race day!

I ended up passing the guy from Mexico and we chatted for a bit. His name was Salvador. I thanked him for asking if I was OK. Then I told him this phrase I learned on the Diva Retreat. "Vamanos a'la ching gara!" (It means "Lets get the f&^% out of here!"

He laughed!

I said that we should say this to ourselves as we reach the top of the pass! He said "OK!" with a big smile on his face.

Getting to the top of Richter Pass was a breeze and I stopped there to eat a power bar. People were wondering why I was stopping. I just wanted to. It was a mini-celebration and as I broke the race into tiny pieces, this was one piece to get through and celebrate before moving on to the next piece. I also wanted to eat and ensure that I would be hydrated and taking in proper nutrition all day.

I also had to take out my retainer to eat. I heard that wearing a retainer and having something to bite down on (not just clenching your jaw) adds 10-15% power output. Dr Gerasim told us this years ago when we got braces and made me a retainer when were doing the bike trip across the country. I wore my retainer in Cozumel and it worked out there so I thought I should try it again.

It was working!

Back on the bike, the next 20km were easy! That's because I was flying down the hills at 60km per hour! Whaahhhh...hooooooo!!!!!!! Taking up the whole lane, no traffic to worry about. It was my moment to shine.

Up. and down. 7 rolling hills. Up. Down. Up. Down....

It was perfect! I was having a fabulous ride!!!

Until the road turned to the right and the headwinds started! The downhills seemed flat and pedalling down them was not fun. Pedaling up was even harder. The flats became a challenge.

Out in any race, there's a moment where you get to "meet yourself". Where you get to see what you're made of.

I knew that was that moment.

I knew I wasn't going to quit. I also knew that it wasn't going to get easier. The headwinds were going to be there for a while. I knew the course. I couldn't pretend. It was time to dig deep.

As I passed one person on the sideline, he quietly said those words, "Dig deep." as I passed. They stuck with me for the next 20km as I truly had to dig deep to get through the headwinds and 120-140km point.

Then, the famous Yellow Lake climb started and once again, I was out of the wind and in my element. It was cold, the road was wet (it had rained earlier) and I said the phrase, "40km to finish." over and over and over. And over. There were cars and people lining the road way. I imagined you and our family out there like in my first race and smiled most of the way up.

The people on the sidelines were so encouraging.

Getting to the top was a welcomed reprieve. I stopped again there and went to the bathroom. Put on my arm-warmers b/c the descent would be cold, heading down into town. Got a 1 minute shoulder massage from the volunteer. And got back on Lexi (my bike) (Short for Lexus...b/c if my bike were a car - it would surely be a Lexus.) :)

Once again, I found myself smiling brightly, holding on tight and loving the reward for getting up the Pass. Sailing down the last 30km into town was a joy! Once back in Penticton, I waved and cheered for the people on the sidelines because they were out there cheering for me and everyone else. It's amazing. If you wave and cheer - they wave and cheer! If you just ride by silently. They let you ride by in silence. What a waste that would be - for everyone!

Getting off my bike was a dream come true. It was only then, that I thought about the next part.

The marathon.

I got my runners on. Brushed my teeth. Grabbed my little piece of paper with a bunch of songs on it and stuffed it into my pocket (in case I needed a little inspiration later).

I put on my new Ironman hat, sunglasses and big smile and headed out to the marathon. (I got the same visor for you that you can wear fishing, Mom! You're going to love it!)

Running through the first mile was easy. So many people. The music. The welcomed feeling of being off my bike....

But after the first couple miles, reality sets in. There is still a long ways to go. I had made it so far though and my swim and bike were awesome! And I still felt strong physically. Mentally, my confidence was growing stronger and stronger because I knew this was (or could be) one of my fastest races if I could remain focused.

Something happened to me out there on the run course, Mom. Something that I'll remember forever.

You know how you always told me that "I could do anything."? Maybe you don't even remember telling me this, Mom, but you did. Years ago, you said, "You can do anything you want, Crystal." Well, I believed you then and over the years, I've reminded myself of this countless times. It's because you told me this, that I can do anything, that I actually can. If you didn't tell me, I would never be the person I am today. I would never have believed that i could do anything. And I likely wouldn't have ever attempted so many big and small things in life.

Well, I've always thought that I was a bad runner. That I wasn't very fast. And it's slowed me down a lot over the years. I've never thought I could really run and it's been disappointing for me to be able to swim and bike moderately but not feel lke I could run very well.

Mom, I was out running with Eric months ago and he said to me , "You know, you're a good runner." I didn't really believe him. But he said it again and again. And the day before the race, he said to me again, "You're a very good runner."

I listened.

And out there on the course, for the first time, I thought that just maybe, I might be a good runner.

I told myself, over and over, as each mile passed, "I'm a good runner! I'm a good runner!"

And I ran. And ran. And before I knew it, I was at the 8 mile point, and Eric passed me (on his way in to finish) and he gave me a big hug that reminded me that I'm a good runner! From mile 8-13, I smiled, thanked the volunteers and walked through every aid station, drinking gatorade, eating those gells that weren't so good any more...and the rest of the time...I ran.

Because I finally believed that I'm a good runner!

At the turn-around, I knew I was going home and nothing would stop me from getting to teh finish line. I knew that Gwen and Kate and everyone would be there! I was so excited to get there!

Mile 16-20 were not easy and I walked a bit. But mostly, I ran. Unless it was up a hill, I ran. I told myself that I could walk up the hills but I had to run every other part, except through the aid stations. And that's what I did.

At mile 20, just 10km to finish, I started to kick it into gear (if you can call it that)! The smile on my face was bigger than ever. It was getting dark but I would be finished before they passed out glow-sticks, which is always a goal of mine!

Mile 20-24 sailed by and now I was back in town. I knew Gwen would be out there and I was so excited to see her. She has a tradition where she comes running out on teh course to find me and we run a bit together. And at mile 24, there she was! Well, at first I could not see her...but boy, could I hear her! There she was, larger than life, an angel in disguise, carrying me home! We flew the next mile together and as we came to a corner, she said, "Look for the red sweater!"

when I came around the corner, with one mile to go, I saw the legendary red sweater, swirling in the air, like there was nothing else there. Never mind teh hundreds of people, all I could see was teh red sweater! And all I could feel was the strenght of my family, carrying me to the finish line.

I stopped to hug Kate, Garth, friends...and ran the last mile surrounded by cheering, screaming people on the sidelines.

Even a bunch of the staff from teh hostel came out to the race. And as I ran the last mile, I heard them cheering so loudly for me - it was truly amazing! I felt so lucky!

I felt like I was on fire, Mom. I passed so many people...all the people that I thought would surely beat me; people I saw in the start of the marathon, who I felt would obviously beat me because "they looked like such good runners.".

I passed them all.

I could hardly contain my emotion. Not at beating them. But at realizing that when someone believes in me...I believe in me.

And I realized for the first time in my life, that I really am a good runner!

The last mile was a small miracle. I thanked God for my life. For myt healthy body. For my family. For the day and for every moment.

They say that out there, somewhere on the Ironman course, your life will change forever.

Mine did.

As I ran through the final few hundred meters and crossed the finish line, I held my arms out to my sides; embracing the moment, embracing my life, embracing the people I love and all that I've been blessed with.

I finished in 14 hours and 13 minutes. My third best race ever!

If the headwinds were less and if I didn't stop so many times to go to the bathroom, I think I would have possibly finished in 13:45...and maybe even better. Who knows...it might have even been my best race ever, beating 13:37, if I didn't stop to have so much fun!

But what fun would that be?

I'll write more and add photos soon, Mom, but I hope you know how grateful I am to you for telling me that I can do anything. You might not realize the power in your words, but I do.

You have not only changed my life with the power of your words, you have made my life what it is.

Thank you, Mom.
I love you and I'm forever grateful.
Crystal

The 4th Discipline

2010-09-01T06:50:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
Sorry it's been a busy couple of days!!!!

I'm not sure where to start, Mom. The past few days have been totally amazing! I wrote last, on the night before the race while at Martha's. It seems like forever ago,now!

Mom, I learned so many things in this race, that I don't even know where to start...things that you know...things that you teach us...almost all about the "4th discipline".

They say that there are not just 3 disciplines in triathlons (swimming, biking and running), but rather, that there are 4. The 4th discipline is the "mind". Or better yet, the SPIRIT! We spend all year (well - some do - and I wish I did) training for the race in the 3 disciplines...but not in the 4th.

Out there in the race, it's the 4th one that needs to be the strongest. And Mom, thank you for somehow, in some way, teaching me about the 4th discipline during my life, because it was my strongest discipline...and I humbly admit that I was on fire!!! The stars were aligned. The day just fell into place. I felt your prayers like the wind beneath my wings. And the tougher it got...the tougher I got!

Race morning (the photo above) was calm, unlike the days before, when gale-force winds scared the crap out of me! The morning was gorgeously calm and there were hints that the sun would actually shine on this day.

Waking up at 4am to get ready and get down to the race for body marking seemed stress-free and relaxing. (Rare!)

Getting ready, doing a final bike check and bag check was easy and thankfully, I didn't forget anything.

I'll send you the play by play of the race later but one thing I know for sure is that it's the 4th discipline that is the secret to getting to the finish line. I know that I could have done a lot more training this past year, biking, swimming and running, but thankfully, I have done a lot of mental training and I don't know how it all happens (I think your prayers have something to do with it) but it just sort of all fell into place.

The mind easily tried to play tricks on me during the race...tempt me to slow down (which I did at times), get unfocused (which also happened) and let the feeling of fatigue take over (which also happened)....but then after a few moments of that, some other part of me took over (I think it was my spirit) and found a way to outsmart my mind, to beat it at it's own game and keep me moving forward.

The swim was easy but the bike ride was long (over 7 hours long) and at one point the headwinds were so bad that it makes you just want to stop. But then this other part - perhaps my stubborn nature (I think I get it from you) :) took over. Going up Yellow Lake (where you were waiting years ago) was easy compared to the headwinds that happened just before then. I'm so grateful that some other part of me took over b/c I really was tired. My butt really did hurt and I could not even think about the marathon that would come after getting off the bike.

And then, out of the blue, I found myself out on the marathon course. 26 miles to go. Then 25. And 24. And when it was all sort of overwhelming, my mind - really...my spirit - took over and decided that I would just keep running. If I wasn't going up a hill, I would run. And that's what I did. I ran within 8 minutes of my best marathon time. I have high expectations...but even I was shocked!

More on the race tomorrow.
But for now, what I learned about the 4th discipline...the SPIRIT (and I think this wisdom ultimately comes from you, Mom) is that:
1. Real strength does not come from physical ability or even mental strategy...it comes from deep inside our heart and spirit!
2. What I focus on becomes my reality. And when I focus on my purpose, there is no pain.
3. The stories I tell myself or hear from other people are all true (even if they're not). My spirit doesn't know the difference between the truth or a lie....so whatever it hears or feels is true. So it might be a good idea to pay attention to what I'm telling myself or who I'm listening to.

Imagine living life like this every day...not just in a race. Now that would be extraordinary!

Mom - I love you.
Thank you for all your prayers. They worked!
And thank you for being the wind beneath my wings.
Love Crystal

Good friends and Great Aspirations!!

2010-08-28T18:50:00.000-07:00

Hi Mom,
This is Martha! We're staying at her house tonight, before the race. It's going to be a BIG day!!

Tonight, life is calm, relaxed and although the Rider's lost in the last seconds...it's been a wonderful evening!

I'm thinking of you, all that you've taught me - to be calm, to keep my feet on the ground, to use my head and do my best without regard for the outcome.

I hope the day goes by smoothly, happily and joyfully!

Tomorrow, I hope to smile the entire way, embrace every moment, run my own race, thank all the volunteers, start strong, ride smoothly and steadily and run with joy in my step, and of course, finish smiling with enough energy to dance and celebrate afterwards.

Thank you God for this strong body and mind.

Thank you for your prayers and EVERYTHING, Mom. You truly are the wind beneath my wings.

Love you,
See you at the finish line!
Crystal

PS: I think I am the luckiest person out there in the race...with sisters, family and so many friend coming out to watch and so many more thinking about me from afar. I am grateful beyond words.

The wind beneath my wings...

2010-08-28T08:08:00.000-07:00

Mom, press the "play" button above and turn your volume/sound up.

Thank you for encouraging me to never give up on my dreams! This is a song I found on the internet called, "Never Give Up On Your Dreams" You can find it at this link (below), but the words are here, too. It sounds like "Up With People"...the people who stayed with us when we were little, when they came to town.
I love you!
Thank you (in advance) for being the wind beneath my wings this weekend!!! I'll call you Sunday night and will be thinking about you!
Love you,
Crystal

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Da3-kn80iak&feature=related

NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!
As life goes by,
We always search for meaning,
And look for love,
And why we seem to fall
There we are, not knowing what the future finds
But it's just a matter of time,
B'fore our rhythm finds a rhyme
B'fore our bells to start to chime
Before we end our uphill climb

(Chorus)
We should never give up,
We should never give in
Always fight for a brighter tomorrow
When the going gets tough,
Then the victory begins
No mountain's as high as it seems
So never give up on your dreams

(Verse 2)
Our time will tell
If we're not what we seem
The things we do, don't match the things we are
Look inside, our happiness is always there
We are simply one of a kind
Can't let others make us blind
With some patience we will find
We can do what's on our mind

(Chorus x 1)

(Bridge)
Work will win when wishing won't,
You've got to pay the price.
No pain no gain don't fizzle out
It's time to roll the dice.
It's not over till it's over
Hang on till the end
You've got to keep the dream alive
You were born to win

How to be happy - part 2

2010-08-26T06:45:00.000-07:00

How to be happy - what I think

1. Discover your innate God-given gifts and talents

2. And then share them with the world

3. Inspire others to discover their gifts and share them

(Gwen has so many innate gifts...her energy, joy, charisma, personality and ability to just be herself and not care what other people think...)

4. Strive to maintain great physical health, b/c with health, we just feel better

5. Have someone or something to love, even if it's just a plant or a spoiled cat

6. Listen to your intuition...and follow it

7. Have faith

8. Be proactive and take charge of your own life. (I don't know too many happy 'victims'.)

9. Live from a place of hope, abundance and gratitude

10. Appreciate the little things in life

11. Work hard, play hard and make the most of every day

12. Rest, relax, rejuvinate and take time for yourself

13. Find a way to contribute to making the world a better place (in your own way)

14. Surround yourself with family, friends and loved ones

How to be happy..

2010-08-25T10:32:00.000-07:00

How to be happy...wisdom from a youtube video
1. Be a do-gooder - perform selfless acts of kindness
2. Don't sweat decisions - the longer a choice is debated, the less happy the person is with the outcome
3. Spend well - spend money on experiences not things
4. Aim high - but not that high
5. Be a joiner - join a group of like-minded people
6. Stop dwelling - excessive introspection is a bad thing
7. Be grateful - count your blessings

How to be happy...what I think my mom would say:
1. Have a strong sense of faith in God
2. Surround yourself with family, friends and loved ones
3. Be a good friend
4. Give of your time to help make others' lives easeir
5. Always have the coffee pot on and the door open
6. Cultivate and create strong relationships with others
7. Have a great sense of humour
8. Work hard, have a strong work ethic and do your best regardless of the outcome
9. Be humble
10. Appreciate the little things in life
11. Look for the good in every situation
12. Be patient, non-judgemental and sensitive to others

Am I close, Mom?

Mom, thank you for what you teach all of us when you thought no one was looking or noticing.
Love you,
Crystal