Oh My God! Today has been a perfect day!!!
Back in 2008, I completed my 6th Ironman race in Hawaii. I was invited to participate b/c I was raising funds for charity. On this day, in 2008, my race day was a "perfect day", much like today has been. Today I found out that I am one of the 50 "international athletes" that have won a place in the Ironman Lottery for the World Championship Ironman race in Kona, Hawaii in October 2010!
These 50 slots are coveted, dreamed about and sought after by several thousand athletes who submit their name and pay for a chance to win a spot!
I am beyond words to describe how lucky I feel in this moment. I can't sit still, I'm so excited!
Mom, I know what you will be thinking when you read this post.
Oh, my dear child! When will it be enough?
I'm not sure, Mom! But what I am sure about is that I love you, need you, and know that you are the wind beneath my wings...not only in my triathlons but in life and in every way...
I love you!
Crystal
PS words escape my mind to even begin to express how I feel right now, so I thought I'd share a letter that I wrote to my family and friends when I was invited to particpate in the Hawaii Ironman in 2008, when raising funds for Room To Read.
PPS: Mom - I just cannot believe it! Some people put their name in the lottery for 5 or 10 years...during their entire Ironman life and never get a slot! I am so excited that I can't sleep! I can't focus! and I can't hardly breathe! I wish you were here so I could call you! I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!!! I need my momma!!!!
IF YOU READ THIS - CALL ME!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm serious! (Now I know what it's like when we don't call you for a bit! I'll never do that again!)
October 18, 2008
It’s been exactly one week since the Ironman race in Hawaii and I’m finally home and able to take a bit of time to write and reflect on this absolutely incredible experience! My feet are up and the blisters (all 8 of them) on my toes are finally starting to heal!
Swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 miles, run 26.2 miles….actually writing the distances of the Ironman race makes me stop and think of just how long this race is, which I don’t often do! It really is a very long, long way! But….but last Saturday, in my 6th IM race, it all went by just a little too fast, a little too quickly and, truthfully, at times, I wished the day would not end!
The Ford Ironman World Championship race last Saturday was one of the best days of my life – primarily because I was there for reasons much greater than my own (www.roomtoread.org) and also because I was not alone! My sister, Gwen, came to Hawaii for the race (which I am so grateful for)! And, I could also feel, without a doubt, the incredible energy and support from family and so many friends, thousands of km away, for days before the race and especially when I woke up at 4:00am on race morning!
I arrived in Kona on October 3rd, after a never-ending 11 hour flight where I met some fantastic coaches from Lifesport Coaching. Upon meeting them, I attended their amazing 3 day training camp from Sat-Mon. This single decision was one of the best decisions I could have ever made in terms of race preparation. Before meeting them, I read abouy the camp but was too scared to attend the camp, thinking that I would be the worst athlete there…but the world has a way of giving you what you need and, luckily, the plane was delayed 5 hours, enough time to meet some incredible coaches! We rode part of the course, swam every day and ran through the hot lava fields. They taught us about the course, about nutrition and about specific requirements to deal with the heat, humidity and wind often in Kona on race day! They gave simple and clear advise, including…“find a big guy that doesn’t kick too much and draft behind him in the swim, how to hydrate and eat effectively on the bike and better running techniques for improving your stride in the marathon”!
All I wanted was some reassurance. I wanted them to tell me that I could do it. I wanted them to take away my nervousness. And, I wanted them to tell me it would NOT be windy! Mark, Bruce and Paul offered reassurance. They told me that I could do it IF I kept my head and wits about me. They helped ease my severe nervousness and they told me that it would definitely – absolutely– be very, VERY windy!
I rested and trained a little more for the next few days following the camp, spent a lot of time soaking up the intoxicating atmosphere (that being surrounded by 2000 fit and healthy people creates), drinking protein smoothies at Lava Java and visualizing a “PERFECT DAY”!
I got an active release (ART) treatment from an amazing lady by the name of Dixie at the ART tent – she had the most amazing spirit, reminded me of Gwen. I was grasping and was looking for anything to make me feel more confident – I thought of taking some new sport drink (a huge “no no” when you didn’t train with it beforehand), I thought of wearing these “compression socks” that everyone seemed to be wearing, thinking that it might give me the guarantee I was looking for. I settled for an ART treatment from this lady. She adjusted and aligned my hips, muscles and walked me through a visualization exercise that literally took the fear out of me regarding the windy bike segment of the race! I was astounded! I never worried about the wind again.
Then, two days before the race, it happened like a heatwave - I could feel this huge overwhelming positive sensation all around me. It was as if family and friends were all around….literally! ….a totally indescribable feeling at 5:00am, alone, drinking coffee in the kitchen of the hostel, with no one physically anywhere near me! (I thought I was going a little crazy at the time but I KNOW that everyone was with me in spirit and it felt so wonderful!) The feeling never left me until the day after the race.
My family emailed to tell me that they were going to be doing 14 hours of consecutive exercise during the race – in support – and they coined it the “Family 14”! How cool is this!! Who could ever have such an incredible family? And emails and phone messages from friends were so appreciated during those few days before the race!! On Friday, the day before the race, all the nervousness came back. I spent most of the day resting and thinking about the race – thinking about all the possible things that could happen and visualizing getting through any obstacle, flat tire, wind, injury, physical or mental breakdown – and I especially visualized reaching the finish line smiling. I was a bit grouchy, snappy and very nervous. Gwen gave me a foot and calf massage, which felt great.
I went to sleep at 8pm and actually had a good sleep, considering the flock of butterflies in my stomach. I woke up at 4:00am, and quietly made my ritualistic ironman breakfast – coffee and a toasted bagel – and I sat in the darkness, listening to my ipod. I felt completely calm.
We walked down to the race area before dawn – the sky was dark blue and the sun was not even on the horizon yet – I got body marked (#’s put on your arms/legs), dropped off my “special needs bags” that you can pick up half way through the bike and run, and then went to check my bike to make sure that it was ready to go. It was standing by my bike that I realized the magnitude of the day. I’d been raising funds for this day for months, trained for months and never thought the day would arrive fast enough. At that moment, I wished I had a few MORE months….I was calm but really wasn’t “ready” at all!
I got my swim suit on and skin-suit (like a think wetsuit). Then I saw Gwen and Kevin (my coach from my 1st Ironman race). We took a few photos and Gwen gave me the biggest hug! She’s the most energetic and dynamic person I know – and it was so great to know that she was there! There could be no better cheerleader, support person, friend! I remember giving Gwen my ipod (that was playing I’m Alive – by Celine Dion) and saying good bye and walking down the green steps down to the water, feeling like time was standing still. Others were stretching, some were crying, some were laughing, and some were staring off into another world or adjusting their suits.
Everyone looked nervous!
I got in the salt-water, and swam to the far left side. Usually, I start near the back but this time, I felt compelled to go to the front! The front!! I tread water near the very front line on the far left and made sure there were not too many people behind me. Being at the front, if you are a slower swimmer (I am), you don’t want too many people behind you b/c they’ll swim overtop you and that feels like a human washing machine to be jostled around by hundreds of people. So – I started extremely to the left, on the edge, where the kayakers were – and there was a big guy hanging on to one of the kayaks, so I hung on too – for the 10 minutes until the race was to start. Why tread water when you can hold on?? Then, just before the start time, the girl in the kayak told me I had to let go of the kayak, which I thought was weird b/c the other guy was still holding on. I let go and the kayak went slightly in front of me.
Within a minute, the cannon fired and the race began. I scrambled with everyone, trying to find my place in the water among 2000 other swimmers, trying not to get hit or kicked as the entire group moved forward. I thought to myself, listening to the instructions of the Lifesport coaches – “find a big guy that doesn’t kick too much”. So – I did! Directly in front of me was the guy holding on to the kayak. Then I realized he was holding on to the kayak for a reason - he was disabled and didn’t have the use of his legs. Now, I know this isn’t funny, but I’m sure you can see the humour in this, and I certainly smiled to myself…he was a perfect person to draft behind – He was, after all, a “big guy who didn’t kick” …so I drafted behind him for a while (it’s legal to do this) and then (feeling slightly guilty), passed him and found another big guy who didn’t kick much (not that guilty, I guess)!
Time passed soooo quickly and I didn’t even realize that we had swam 1.2miles (2km) and were at the turn-around point! The second half of the swim was as smooth as the first and before I knew it, the 4km swim was over, and I was climbing the green steps and running to the transition area to put on my bike clothes and start the EPIC 180km bike ride!
Thankfully, there were lots of bikes in the transition area which meant that I was not dead last!!! As I got my bike and ran towards the start line, I heard Gwen cheering and I knew that every other triathlete there wished they had someone like her to cheer for them, too! Getting comfortable on the bike was easy. The first 2 ½ hours of the ride were good – nice tailwind, not too hot, stunning black lava fields as far as you could see! …and then the wind started. By the turn-around, 90km later, the winds were in full force and as I passed the windmills that generate power – I realized that they were there for a reason – it was WINDY! It was now HOT – with temperatures reaching 42 degrees! And my butt was getting sore! I could feel the gritty salt on my face.
After the turn-around, the severe cross-winds started. I didn’t see it, but some people were getting blown off their bikes, it was so windy. I put my head down and held on tight! I also had a long piece of tape on the cross-bar of my bike, with 25 song titles written on it. So, I began the concert in my head and sang songs to myself for the next 3 hours. It got hotter, it got windier and I didn’t even realize that over 6 hours had passed!
I thought of my family – doing their own segment of the “family 14”. I thought of all the emails and friends who supported me and I thought of why I was in this race – to help kids around the world get an education through Room To Read. I thought of how fortunate I was to have this opportunity – and was grateful that the Ironman Office picked me to receive a media slot over countless other applicants! Only 20km to go and I was off this bike! But the headwinds were so strong that you could barely ride 12km/hour! This is completely demoralizing after being out there all day – and then to have to work so hard to go a mere 12km/hour! I wasn’t feeling so fortunate any longer!
Then, I passed a guy who got off his bike, threw it down, and then sat on the pavement beside it, completely exhausted, mentally and physically. The “fortunate” feelings returned, knowing that, at least, I was still sitting on my bike and not on the pavement. I asked him if he was OK (which, in retrospect, was probably a pretty dumb question to ask, since, clearly, he was not doing well). He said he was fine and I passed him with my head down and picked another song. Finally, the road shifted direction and I was in town. The 180th km was great, near the music, festivities and transition area!
Gwen, Kevin and thousands of people were there, cheering!! I got off my bike, peeled my song list off the frame and took it to the transition area, where I put it on my water bottle that I would carry through the run. I had another piece of tape on the bottle already – 26 names – of people I love – one for every mile of the marathon.
By now, 9 ½ hours had passed. My butt hurt, I was sunburned, even with 50spf on, I was sick of gatorade, powerbars and powergels, but I felt absolutely fantastic! The email I had sent out the previous week – asking (begging, grasping and desperately wishing, really) for people to hold a positive vision of me getting through the race smiling was working! I couldn’t take this grin off my face! Crazy but true!
I couldn’t actually believe that I was in the Hawaii Ironman – and was feeling OK. One might want to clarify that the first place finishers were already completing their marathon and coming in to the finish line….so my pace was good – for me – but clearly, I was not out there breaking any records and was at the proverbial “back of the pack” among the worlds fastest triathletes at the Ironman World Championship!
The run started so easily, too easily…and the first ¼ of the marathon clicked by as a guy named Brian (who was a twin also) and I ran/walked and chatted. He was from the US. He only had one leg and it was incredible to see the crowds cheer for him in awe! He was inspiring, to say the least! We had a great chat, but I couldn’t continue to stop/start/walk/run as he needed to, so I went on ahead and tried to run consistently. I drank at every aid station, fearing dehydration by the end of the marathon, considering the heat. The race continued out to the lava fields and “energy lab”, which is a very hot segment of the course where temperatures reached well into the 40’s during the day.
I ran, walked, looked at my water bottle and sang songs to myself and thought of all the people in my life, who were subtly pushing me to keep going. I looked for the “wall”. I waited for it to find me. 3 hours went by…The night came and it was completely dark out on the course. No street lights, no nothing – except black lava fields and lights from passing cars and glow-sticks – bobbing up and down as runners and walkers got closer to achieving their goal. The day was going by too fast. I walked, took it all in, enjoyed every moment and thought about the incredible day.
I found myself grinning ear-to-ear for no reason at all, as I power-walked along. I tried not to think about the many blisters on my toes that I could begin to feel with each step. I could feel certain blisters getting bigger on my big toes and other blisters popping as I stepped. While I felt great, walking and running was beginning to seriously hurt my feet. A friend had given me a little sealed envelope with instructions to take it out on the race with me and “open when you need a little inspiration”. I was now reaching 35km in the marathon and although I never found myself flat-out on the pavement, I thought it was a perfect time to open it, as my feet were seriously giving me grief. The temperatures got down to about 28 degrees at night – and it was still hot, humid and my feet knew it! The pavement was even still warm from the heat of the day. I opened the envelope - It was a collage of photos – of family, friends, and little school children from Room To Read. Suddenly, my feet didn’t seem to hurt so much. And in the pitch-black night, I started to walk a little faster and run a little more back into town. Getting closer to the finish line made it easy to get back into a full run!
I knew Gwen would be at the finish line. I knew my family had all had a great day and I knew that family and friends had been pushing me along every second! I ran the last 3 km (It’s downhill and a nice easy stretch!) and before I knew it – I was in the home-stretch, the last 100metres, with music blaring, tons of people cheering, and I was smiling – the biggest smile! Going over the finish line was absolutely fabulous. And seeing Gwen there, (She was volunteering at the finish line) was a total highlight. I had thought about her the last 5km and knowing she’d be at the finish line was truly motivating! Getting to the finish line brings me back my favorite quote – a quote that my sisters gave me on a plaque the night before my very first Ironman, that says “The miracle isn’t that I finished, the miracle is that I had the courage to start”. (By George Sheehan)
After finishing the race, Gwen and I ate pizza, walked around a bit and inspected the blisters. Not good. Flip flops wouldn’t work b/c the blisters were btwn my two toes so I had to put my runners back on! Ohhhh – not good! Gwen was ready to go home – cheering and volunteering is a LONG day! She had been up as long as I had! I wanted to stay until midnight to watch the other finishers come in. Jorge, the Brazilian guy who helped me put my bike together, also staying at the hostel, had made it hours before me but there was still another girl, Joanna, who was staying at the hostel too, still out on the course and I wanted to be there to cheer for her.
I also wanted to just sit and take it all in – the cheering, the celebration, the people, atmosphere, the reason I was there, and I wanted to give a silent “thank you” to everyone who had been thinking about me all day. Gwen told me that she’d been in contact with our family and that Rudy, our brother, ran 50km – yes – 50km on his treadmill today! I was in awe! The whole family had been out exercising!! Gwen left and I sat on the sideline until midnight.
I didn’t know it, but Gwen stayed too, watching to make sure I was OK b/c she had seen people in the medical tent looking very badly and was worried that I wouldn’t make it home on my own.
I sat on the sideline as the 17 hour mark came closer. Joanna made it in at 16:55! Yay!!!! The last few finishers came in, just under the wire, except for one that arrived at 17:03. The time doesn’t really matter though – it’s really just about being there – and about making a difference in your own life and in the lives of others.
My sister, Cindy says you just have to “keep moving forward” and that’s really all you have to do. Just keep moving! Time is relative. Some people finished the race much earlier than others, some people finished it much later. Some people didn’t finish and some people (according to the coaches at LIfesport) may still be out there on the course the next morning, walking it in, not giving up, still in the same race that the paperboy is delivering the results of! I know that some people were out there trying to prove something and others likely had no idea why they were there. For me – I knew why I was there – and I’m so grateful for the opportunity to compete in the Ford Ironman World Championship – to raise funds for Room To Read –and so far, we’re at $220,000- thanks to the generous support of amazing people who donated! My goal is still to get to $500,000 by next spring. Hopefully, the Ironman TV show on NBC will provide further exposure for Room To Read, as well. It is being shown on December 13th on NBC!!!
I’m also grateful for my family and so many friends who supported me, who love me and who held that vision of me…finishing…smiling! Thank you! You did it!!! I’m very grateful!
I’m not sure “what’s next”, but one thing I do know for sure – and as I crawled up to my top bunk at the hostel, after showering (making sure NOT to wash the black numbers off my arms), lying in bed with my medal around my neck – I know it was a PERFECT DAY!
Thanks for reading this. Sorry it was so long. Hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for helping to make this day a “perfect day”!!!! I wish you many perfect days in the future – starting today!
- This was a letter written to my family and friends in 2008 when I finished my 6th Ironman race, the Ford Ironman World Championship, upon being invited to participate while raising funds for Room To Read. -
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