Just start on SOMETHING!

"That's enough!"
Yes...that is just about enough! (I can hear you saying this Mom, in exactly your tone.)

No more missing my daily post to you, Mom. No more running around in circles. No more spinning my wheels stuck in one place.

While trying to be intentional and be in the present moment, I've got to just start on something!

I seem to be stuck in some sort of holding pattern right now. I think it's caused by my indecision and lack of clarity around my work and the direction I want to take in my career. I know I'm on the verge of something AMAZING but I'm not exactly sure what that is.

I've worked hard this past year and for several years. And there's been much of that time that I knew I was doing exactly what I was supposed to be doing...and now it feels like I've sort of outgrown where I've been but I'm not exactly sure what I'm supposed to be growing into.

Secretly, I think all the work in the jungle was somehow divinely created to give me reason to slow down and be in one place, focusing on something physical that needed my attention so that I didn't have to really think. (And I thank God that it doesn't seem to end...although this is the last of the jungle offerings for this year. I picked the last peaches a few days ago and the rhubarb too. :(


I know I'm exactly where I am supposed to be...in this house...surrounded by family and friends that I love and who love me...and creating space to allow the future to unfold.

But it's FRUSTRATING! It would be easy if I was content teaching my business programs...or facilitating workshops or...or...or...AND WHILE I LOVE ALL OF THOSE THINGS...I feel that I'm being called somewhere else...to something of much greater impact on a much larger scale (not that I'm to be moving/travelling so much...b/c I don't think that's the case...but I do feel that my level of influence or what ever it is that I'm to be doing next will have a far-reaching impact to/for others.

It's very exciting. But I am frustrated. Unsure. Sort of lost. Wishing someone would tell me what to do.

Yet...I know the answer will come from within and I just have to wait and be open to it and trust that even if I don't know where I'm going, there's a higher calling that is guiding me. And I do believe that.....I just wish I knew where we were going!

For now, I realize that I have to tie up a few loose ends. Start on SOMETHING! And remain open to the gorgeous sunrise tomorrow!

This was the sunrise this morning and it was a glorious moment...one that made me stand there in awe, mesmerized.

And even if it's cloudy tomorrow (the forecast is for rain), it can still be sunny in my world...if I just get started on something and not let myself get too frustrated by this process of growth.

Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.

At least I'm grateful that I'm growing a little...and not going through a stagnant change.

Mom, I love you. That's enough. No more spinning my wheels. I've got lots to get to before you get here. Most of which are activities that I think God has designed for me to experience "being" in while doing them.

Love you.
See you soon.
Crystal