How to be connected...to me.

Here we are. 10:44pm on a Saturday night, after another jam-packed day.

There's something soooo NOT living intentionally about filling your day so full that you're just running from one thing to the next and then exhausted at the end of the day.

I don't like the impatient side of me that appears when I'm pushed for time, either.

When my day is so busy, with one thing right after another, even if they're all great things that I want to fit into my day, whether it be a 90 minute run or a visit with a friend and a bunch of other work-related things, like today, it's just not the way I want to live my life. When I fill my day sooo full, I miss out (and I short-change others as well) on a fabulous, wonderful, time-constraint-free experience with whatever we were doing.

Yes, I know that "fabulous, wonderful, time-constraint-free time" is actually what most people call RETIREMENT, and I am certainly not there yet...but I could structure my day a little differently.

I am getting better, but I would like to be a little more intentional about how I plan my day. I'm not living intentionally when I pack it so full that I don't have a lot of breathing space to take extra time for people.

I'm not really living, either, when I'on the go so fast. And I'm certainly not connected...to me. My heart. Or my spirit.

This lovely new home has been instrumental in helping me to (let's be honest, it's forcing me to) slow down, be present, not take on too much and be connected to me, but I could be a little more connected to my spirit, I feel.

Moving has taken a lot of time (especially when you're doing it one car-load at a time), and then there's the mini-orchard, as I like to call it, in the back yard. And selling the other house and finally cleaning out the garage and art room there. And running the hostel during the busy summer season... yes...all great and wonderful things that fill up my day...I know I am blessed.

I am so blessed...with the freedom to create my own schedule. Blessed to be able to find security in self-employment for the past 12 years. Blessed to be able to live across the street from Gwen, now. Blessed to have family that are always there when you need them. Blessed to be healthy and able to just go out and run for an hour and a half. Blessed to be surrounded by so many people that love me. Blessed to love them back. Blessed that my team at the hostel is so simply amazing that I cannot even comprehend it! Blessed to have security, dreams,possibilities and opportunities that most of the world couldn't even imagine.

Writing and taking time to slow down connects me to me. (Thank you for this, Mom!)
It's now the morning, Mom. I had to go to bed a few paragraphs ago. This morning is so calm, warm and the sun is so bright...it's gorgeous! The water is so calm this morning that it's definitely a water-ski morning!!

In this moment, I realize that being connected...to me happens when I think of all the things I am grateful for. When I take those things for granted, I loose sight of my calling and that connection with myself, my heart and my spirit. I get caught up in the "stuff" of life that usually I side-step when I'm in a place of gratefulness.

I'm going to make a little card to remind me of what I'm just learning here:

How to be connected...to me:
1. Be totally present in the moment
2. Be mindful of all that I am grateful for
3. Be true to my own path, following my true purpose

Thank you, Mom, for this time to just sit and be with you. Thank you for your inspiration. I love you.
Crystal
PS Thank you also for the jam we're going to make! My freezer is FULL of frozen cherries! This is the last of them. Whoo hooo! The rest are picked, washed and pitted, in the freezer, waiting for you!